


Vheraan'an

by Rivain



Series: It's coming the fear it calls him [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - Various Authors, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Multi, Slow Burn, StrangeLove
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2019-10-30 23:43:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 29,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17838266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rivain/pseuds/Rivain
Summary: She would be looked down upon in another life for making the decisions she had in her life. She would have been called a coward and yet it was precisely her running that took her where she wanted to be, a place called home.orNobody likes being taken advantage of, the Hero of Ferelden is no different. Her adventures have changed so much in the little time that has passed since she slew Uruthmiel. That doesn't mean her story is over... in fact, many would say that 9.30 was just the beginning for the Hero of Ferelden and she was far from done directly affecting the World of Thedas.





	1. Unexpected Return

**Author's Note:**

> 9.41 : Returning from Haven as envoy

"Yo Sebastian!" The prince nearly jumped at her sudden appearance. "You will not believe the shenanigans the Inquisitor is facing. Oh! Varric says heya ex-choir boy."

"Welcome back Warden Commander." 

"Yo. Nala, Seb. Nala or I will resort to addressing you by 'Royal non-holiest." She threatened in-joke. "Honestly I didn't want to return, but Cassandra looked ready to throttle me...and I am not even sure if she even knew  _who_ I was." The elf digressed, "because if not...then I cannot have guaranteed that I would have returned at all and that would not have been for lack of trying." He watched as she sauntered from her leaning position at the entrance of his office straight to her favorite position at the couch that overlooked the city and sat under sunlight throughout most of the day. "Seriously though, the fuck would I have done? I specialize in Blights and we don't have the same rights issues, for lack of better word," She quickly added and he acknowledged with a nod fully aware of where she was going with this conversation. "With mages in the Order. You're Warden first and foremost."

"That kind of black and white logic is beneath you." He interrupted quickly as he placed his elbows on the desk and placed his cheek in his laced fingers. "And with that kind of logic, the Seeker could have easily held the Wardens, if not yourself responsible for Anders' actions." Her amber eyes didn't narrow visibly, but having spent the amount of time they had in one another's company he knew that she was internally glaring at him in that minute or two of silence.

"Truth." Her eyes shifted away from him and over to the bookshelf behind him, "And if they were to be able to figure out  _who_ I was then I would be quick to explain that the Anders you knew...Hawke knew. The world knows is  **not** the same human I conscripted into the Order. As it stands he was under Command of an Orlesian Commander, was he not?" When he had first met the woman he would have never imagined just how natural she was when it came to the game of politics. She by no means enjoyed it or found it amusing most of the time, but the Dale was uncannily good at it... so much so that even after he had become privy to some of her more  _intimate_ secrets he didn't initially (or for the longest time) believe her and there were some things he still didn't believe to this day.

"You conscripted him." The Prince stood his ground. 

"Nay. I conscripted Anders...not whatever that  _thing_ he turned into. Honestly, it is impossible for me to believe, even after all the evidence and firsthand accounts have been presented to me, for me to believe that we are speaking of the same man. It's hard for me to imagine the Anders you knew and that is in no way me defending him as many would believe."

"And it is hard for me to imagine anything other than the man who murdered countless innocents in that explosion and the war that it caused." He paused thinking it over for a moment before deciding now was a better time than before for him to persist. "You speak highly of him, dote on him. Tell me of the Anders you knew, you've been vague in all of our previous conversations involving him."

"I never knew you were interested in the man before." The elf admitted as she leaned back and basked in the sun, she still looked sick and he was sure she was keeping something from him about that particular topic... but that would be an argument for another day.

"Anders... _ **My**_ Anders was probably the exact same man you knew." She thought back with a soft smile, "He was angry extremely so with the world he was born into and the treatment of people like him. I stand firmly in my belief that both Anders and Justice were better off without one another. He had so much potential and I really do believe that he could have done some amazing things in the Order. What I loved the most about Anders, because I did love him," she added with a quick shy smile and glance at the Prince. It reminded Sebastian of a teenager admitting their secret crush and it made him feel as if perhaps they were closer than he believed they were as much as it reminded the Prince that the Warden-Commander was like everyone else and had the capability of crushing on someone. She was always completely business, even when she made it seem like she wasn't. "Was his facade of immaturity. His jokes were much deeper and darker than anyone bothered to look into. He was a troubled man but was able to get others to overlook that. Having worked with Wynne, a grandmotherly Circle mage happy where she was in life and Morrigan an Apostate happy, at least for her, with where she as life. Finding and meeting someone who was not happy with their hand dealt. Who was constantly being hunted down by Templars and finally had the chance to begin to feel safe from being conscripted was probably not the best time to get to know someone. The way he and Justice, a spirit of Justice, clicked told me that there was something good in the man..." She derailed he could see it in the way her eyes glossed over as she spoke and the way her sentences broke down into full, but not cohesive thoughts. "I think I was most surprised with his belief in your Chantry. He was the one who informed me of how the texts had been changed over the years, twisted to fit whatever beliefs others wanted to spread." 

"You're versed?" He relaxed back into his chair.

"Most under my Command are not Dalish and none of those I traveled with during the Blight were. In order to understand them better, I've become versed in various religions and beliefs. Not with any great understanding in one or the other, but enough to begin to understand how others morals, beliefs, and opinions may be affected." 

"And your thoughts?"

"A good starting guideline." He motioned for her to continue with an arched brow, "Good in theory...abused more times than naught. The fact the Chantry has been politicized both in and out of Tevinter doesn't bode well for anyone." He nodded and thought it over, in all their years together that had not been a conversation they had. The closest she had come to crossing that line was when she asked him for an overall rundown of Starkhaven how she was before his family's deaths, during his cousin's reign...which she got more on her own and with help of Zevran and how he would run her.

"Which would you say is your favorite study?" 

"Favorite is not the word I would use there." She quickly replied, "I am...to this day the most interested in the Qun. I do not agree with plenty, but the organization, implementation, and origin of it all intrigue me greatly." 

"Does Sten have anything to do with this?" Her smirk at his question told him the answer before she spoke. They both knew that he was a huge factor in it all, how it could not be when she had spent the better part of a year intimately with complete strangers in the hopes of stopping a Blight. Completely sheltered in her own life to become the most important person in all of Thedas with no training or opinion on the matter. 

"Everything. Had I the time I'd have stayed and further inquired knowledge of him and his people." That was a new bit of information that the Prince had not been privy to. "Much like how I've spent much of my recent time here with you. At your side." 

"Oh?" 

"Well your background was beyond me upon our initial meeting. Zevran, much likely myself, likes to keep his hand close to his chest. But you reminded me of a devout close friend whose line of work didn't exactly agree with her beliefs. She was able to carve out her own little niche and shifted to where her beliefs were more of guidelines than something to be followed without question or alteration for application in her life." Sebastian had a good idea of who the woman was speaking about and he had to admit, much like it was hard for her to imagine  _ **his**_ Anders... it was hard to think of Left Hand of the Divine as the Hero's sweet redheaded Cloister Companion. Her reputation precedes her across all the land. "You were Royalty, reclaiming your throne who happened to be right there when the world was turned on its head. You lost someone, many it would turn out, in that explosion. There was no place better to watch a Shemlen directly affect the world guided by their own beliefs and faith." He appreciated the time they shared, the friendship they formed and the memories they made... still.

"Enough so to apparently spend the rest of your days here instead of with the Wardens or your Clan?" 

"Curious isn't it?" She asked with a wink before placing her chin in the palm of her hand and looking out at the city. 

 


	2. Presumptuous

During  Hauls ass to Haven, creepy town (3 days travel –days 8-11)  

          "I understand the logical understanding of placing a Temple and town on a mountaintop, but that does not mean that I enjoy having to ruck my arse up there in order to get something done." She plopped down next to her assassin-turned-best-friend and watched as he sharpened his daggers. Based on her assumptions they should be running into Haven sometime late morning tomorrow if they got up and headed out just before dawn. There was no need for them to make camp, but she felt far more secure out in the open than she felt surrounded by walls.  

     "You wish to talk?" She couldn't stop the flattened expression that slid onto her features even if she had wanted to. "Ah, good. I have a question for you."   

     "I have my secrets, but I will try to be open with you." She admitted, "Plus, how could I refuse? This is the first time you have inquired about me." The assassin paused for all of a moment before placing his blades down and looking at the Warden directly.  

     "You and Alistair...are quite close, are you not? I am curious as to the nature of your relationship." Her features hardened even though she wanted nothing more than to play it off as some sort of joke and smirk over at the elf. 

     "You know if I didn't know you better, which I may not and in which case I need to perhaps start questioning my gut feeling, but I would say it sounded as if you were jealous?" Had anyone turned to the two elves whilst those words left her lips they may have found themselves surprised by just how jovial the words were compared to the steeled expression that the Dale held.

     "Jealous?" His laughter was music to her ears, honestly, it was these little pieces of happiness that she saw in her companions that kept her going. Outside of pure spite, of course, they had become her home whether or not they liked it—even the assassin who may very well just be waiting for the perfect time to slit her throat. "Not I, no." _Oh, thank the heavens._ "But one does not need to be jealous to be leery of rushing headlong into...complicated situations."     

     "Boy, did you hit that on the nail."  There were numerous situation that played through her mind, some seemed a lifetime ago and completely trivial in comparison to her life today. 

     "Our flirtation has been fun, but if you believe that what you and Alistair have is real perhaps it would be best if we desisted. Complication avoided, everyone, is happy."   

     "That would be assuming that everything around us was not complicated and not interwoven into everything else going on." She frowned leaning back, "It's a bit presumptuous if you were to ask me."  

     "Perhaps I am. I have always believed in being direct when the situation calls for it, however." _I yearn to return to a life like that my falon_. "I make no claims upon you, nor would I dream of such. You are free to pursue your fancies as you desire, and I would have it no other way." She shouldn't have been as relieved or surprised to be hearing that from the assassin. The Warden had quickly learned that either it was an Antivan thing, but then her mind wandered over to some of the conversations she held with Duncan and he was from Rivain... she was beginning to chalk it all up to be a 'northerner' thing.  "I suspect Alistair, however, would not feel the same way. If there is to be something between you and I, to string him along would only hurt him deeply, surely you know this is true."   

     "You know, of all people, I don’t know why I thought that you would force me to choose."   

    "And what would you have me do, if that were the case, then? I am many things: A murderer, a thief, a lover... but I am no cheat If whatever is between us cannot be honest, let it not be at all." She couldn't help but laugh at how once again duty found its way to snuff out whatever interests she may have in another. Leliana, there was no way she could sit back and watch her dally with Alistair and play him along. He was far too good-hearted. Zevran, they saw eye to eye on many a thing and he was just about as morally grey as she was due to his profession and yet here he was.   

     "I want you to remember this conversation." She managed out while laughing, ignoring the curious looks of some of their other companions. "It will be something we will both either look back upon and laugh or cry. I will refrain, though the flirty nature is still going to continue I will not change who I am. You make me feel comfortable, even if that dagger of yours may be biding its time to take my life. Had I been given an entirely different hand to play, this conversation wouldn't have needed to have come up." She winked.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be much like my [KGB] chapters. The good news is that I have quite a bit of this story written out. I just cannot write things in order and have to be in the mood to sit down and completely write out a novelization of the heroes tales. 
> 
> I may or may be posting general years/months for when specific chapters take place. Do note that this can (and likely will) change as the story actually gets typed out and I finalize the timeline. (: 
> 
> Additionally, chapters themselves may change/alter once they have their proper place in the timeline... and the majority of these are going to be full length (5000+ word) chapters. [Though if there is a 5000-word chapter in here...I can almost guarantee that it takes place in larger multi-chaptered chapter-- if that makes sense]. These 'snippets' may not be as short as the KGB ones... I apologize now for that if that is what you were looking for. 
> 
> Kudos/Reviews/Messages really give me a kick to post something up. I make no promises on a specific schedule, but note that chances are the more interest opinions/critiques/kudos I get the higher the chance of multiple or quicker updates.
> 
> If you have any questions or want to see specific chapters with/about specific characters/scenes/missions/ideas I will be more than willing to write some up and incorporate (and give credit) to those who requested them in the actual novel.


	3. I'll Be Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She hadn't been completely honest with absolutely anyone in that room. Not with Sebastian, not with Zevran and most definitely not with the King himself and she wouldn't be starting anytime soon with this new revelation and death. In an attempt to keep the King safe she must incriminate herself, come from the shadows and possibly become a pariah to those she saved over a decade ago.

Her senses were still piqued as a deathly silence fell amongst those who remained living in the ballroom. She couldn't help but internally chuckle at the fact that the last time she had been in this very room there had been a death as well, she still vividly remembered how cleanly she took off Loghains head and how Anora's cries echoed in the hall. There had been plenty of new faces she had spoken with and taken up the positions of the past that she had the pleasure and displeasure of speaking with. Thirteen years and still talk of the Blight lingered. Some who couldn't have been but children when it spread over the lands were seemingly experts on the matter, but none of that mattered. There had only been one person she had wanted to visit during this solemn visit... yet a part of her was glad that her fill-in mother hadn't been able to attend.

As her high began to edge down she was able to focus on the chatter of those in the room, there were not many who were skilled enough to fight and were forced to scramble and hide while the handful held off the attack. She couldn't blame the King or Queen for the lax security, or rather she chose not to. They had no reason to believe that they were in any danger, but this also concerned the Warden as she frowned and zeroed in on the King himself. She hadn't missed his surprise at the attack, no. She had been watching him keenly to solidify whether or not the rumors were true... they were.

"Those were?" 

"Darkspawn? Again? So soon?" 

"Does that mean there is another Blight on the horizon?" Some of the same  _dal'in_ who were such experts in all things Blight were shocked and even in denial about the bodies that littered the ground. Those who were old enough to face or recognize these horrors expressions were taut as their minds began running through possible explanations and preparations that may need to be made. 

"Yes." She stepped forward raising her voice, her blue eyes solely focussed on the King as she spoke. "Those are darkspawn..." Even though she had been introduced as a Warden it would seem that in the excitement of the last hour many had forgotten. 

"You're the Grey Warden Prince Sebastian brought with him, are you not?" His voice was confident and familiar, missed even. She couldn't help but be thankful for her halla mask that covered her upper features. Her blonde curls were long since a thing of the past as long wavy locks of white fell to her buttocks, her amber eyes were Warden Blue and she had ten years of scars and ware on her peanut butter truffle skin. 

"Aye, your majesty. Doshiel is a close friend and ally of not only myself personally but Starkhaven as a whole. She happened to be in Starkhaven when I received your invitation." She was giving everyone in the room high praise as they all remained silent as the entire scene unfolded. She also made a mental note to whack Sebastian upside the head later, he was moving to put himself in a position to allow her to remain anonymous having long since known her reasoning and desire to remain deceased to the world after the events that played out over a decade ago. 

She hadn't the heart to tell him that while she wished to continue onward as her own person and leave those titles to gather further dust... that was no longer a viable option.

"And you've encountered these type of Darkspawn before?" He was shocked, thirteen years may have passed but he was still Alistair to her. Then again who wouldn't be concerned with talking darkspawn, it wasn't exactly something she had shared with the world when she was in Amaranthine and it was something she ensured that her Wardens kept to themselves...to this day the majority of her Order had no idea of the new threat that loomed on the horizon. Not that she wanted to keep it from them, but she had a lot of other things to fix after their internal Civil War that it had just fallen on the backburner. Sure, she had let her Commanders be privy to this new piece of information... but with all of the reforms and the politics that she had to clear up with her new position... it was not something she wanted to have to explain to those who didn't  _need_ to know.

"Yes." She could feel the temperature in the room fall with the gasps that escaped various lips. Not only were they possibly having to accept the fact that another Blight would corrupt their lands...but these Darkspawn were sentient, could speak and use tactics... if this attack were any indication. "Let me properly introduce myself." She offered as she stepped forward passed Sebastian who offered her a concerned glance. "Doshiel is a name that I had chosen for myself to offer those when dealing as a Warden." She let her waist length hair fall free from her messy bun, the curls reduced to light waves due to the weight of it all. "But since I have returned to my Origins I must apologize My King..." She knelt down before the blonde, knowing that his mind and that of the others in the room were trying to place her before the reveal. "It has been far too long since we've spoken and some would say that it is ironic that we would share gazes in this very room..." Her right hand grasped the edge of her mask as her left pulled the elastic along the back tilting her head down as she removed it and her heart raced in her chest. "And I fear that this is no coincidence." Her blue eyes met his hazel and his mind began to process the scene before him. "My return that is." 

There was an awkward moment of pause as she knelt there, "I simply ask that you spare the Prince of any repercussions for this travesty. I did not inform him of the danger when I became aware of it myself or my suspicions before our arrival." 

"Mahariel?!" It was nice to know that under all that Kingly charade he put on that Alistair, her Alistair, was still in there. 

"I told you that you would make a fine King." She acknowledged with her iconic cheshire smile. "Just look at you." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after the events of Inquisition and will follow the timeline/writing of my own creation. I will be posting chapters that follow the Canon plot of games that follow Inquisition after they come out, but having most of the Commander's story already written up until Inquisition and with how long it takes games to come out I have had nothing but time to come up with some original content.


	4. Doomed to Repeat it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi was a sweetheart and after Kinloch hold she needed something that should be open and close... should be easy. Check out an abandoned Keep, what's the worst that could happen?

“Exactly Alistair.” She stated simply looking him dead in the eye. “We have a Blight to stop and that sometimes means making tough decisions. Which is what I did and do. I took a gamble if we are lucky it will pay off. Now come on. Let’s not keep him waiting.”

“Him?”

“Late for a date are we?” Oghren chuckled keeping his own opinions on what just went down to himself, for now. “Well, we wouldn’t want to be rude now would we?” Alistair followed close behind and she could almost feel his anger rolling off of him.

“I hear you… Don’t disrupt my concentration.” An elderly voice replied from across the room, said room scattered with what she presumed were more Warden bodies. Nala glanced over at Levi, who was now along for the ride at this point, before nodding and stepping forward toward the voice. The mage, obvious by the staff on his back, stepped away from his table as they neared and came down the steps toward them. “Even now the demons seek to replenish their numbers. Are you to thank for this unwelcomed but temporary balance?”

“Thirty years. We were told thirty years. Right, Alistair?”

“Thirty years.” He confirmed seemingly as shocked as she was by the impossibility standing before them.

“And yet here you stand, grey and wrinkly sure… but alive, after all this time?”

“Only just… I have only a short time left.”

“Can we have some of his short time? Jeeze, look at him.” Nala grumbled to herself though not so quiet that her companions couldn’t hear her.

“Why are you here? What is your intent?”

“Before I do anything else there are a couple of things I am going to need answered.”

“What things, I wonder? Ask.” She could already tell that she was not going to like talking to this old man.

“First and foremost. You should be dead. Long since dead. Sophia wasn’t Sophia, got that. Demon took over her body, but you. How have you survived this many years?”

“The Chantry foolishly forbids blood magic—but there are so many secrets to uncover.” Nala nodded following along, not quite demons… but then again being a Warden in itself meant Blood magic and it was no different to her than how Morrigan blew flames out of nowhere. It was just another thing of impossibility in this world. “As my body decayed, I found ways to extend it. But that can only go so far.”

“And your experiments?”

“They were necessary. Any tool, any iota of information that could defeat the fell demons was justified. As a Warden, you should know that.”

“Necessary? Having to relieve yourself after an eight-hour ride is necessary. But there’s no excuse for summoning demons.” A smirk began to crack on the elf’s lips at Alistair retort but stopped the moment he finished his statement forgetting that he hadn’t read the details in the other room. As far as he was aware they were talking about demons.

“Charming.”

“In his defense, there is probably a lot of things about the Wardens that we should know. But alas, we are young spritely little things." She explained with the wave of her hand before motioning across the room and glaring, “But what in the name of the Dread Wolf happened here? Demons? Wardens? A rip into the fade? Someone royally messed up, and I mean Royally. Capital R.”

“What use would storytelling serve? The tyrant Arland is long dead. As is all our noble co-conspirators and the grand rebellion. Sophia’s corpse may walk and talk, but she is long since dead.”

“Yeah, not so much anymore and speaking of which it’s her great-grandson who brought me here.” Levi cautiously looked over to her and the elf couldn’t help but smile and nod. If he truly wanted answers, this mage could very well be the last chance he had at getting them.

“Master mage, uh, ser. My family name has been worth less than dirty for over a century. Do you have any proof that Sophia is a hero?”

“The boy who braved the mists. So you heeded my call.” Averus outright laughed at this point and he almost looked the part of a great grandfather as much as he sounded it. “And you are a Dryden? The cosmos has a sense of humor.” _Tell me about it._ Nala thought to herself as the mage continued. “Your great-great-grandmother was the best of us. Brave, charismatic, fiery. Utterly devoted to the fight…” He paused and looked away happily for a moment, then followed with a frown. “But still we lost. We fought against a tyrant, you know? So full of vigor, then. So blind to conquest. But proof? There’s none to be had.”

“Well shit. Sorry, Levi. Sincerely.”

“I… I had hoped. But thank you, Warden.”

“Also, I may not know much about magic. But I am willing to bet that you had to know summoning that many demons was foolhardy.”

“Perhaps, but it was survival.”

“Fair.”

“For months, I prepared the summoning circles, researched the darkest depths of the Fade. That moment was a triumph of demonic lore. Dozens of demons called by my hand.” He was proud, one could tell by the tone in his voice. “But with so many variables, I suppose calculation errors were inevitable. I was so close.”

“Many things that I am willing to overlook as a Warden and living being, especially in terms of survival. But the fact still stands. You are to blame for all this. Some things you just don’t do.”

“From a Warden, that means something. So tired, so old.” Nala always had a soft spot for the elderly, Avernus was definitely elderly and very much sounded it. “Let me undo my greatest of mistakes. Let me cleanse this place. Then… Then, I will accept whatever justice you feel I merit.”

“No, hold on. My brain is just now catching up with everything."She couldn't already feel the verge of a major headache beginning to throb. "You spent months preparing? So Commander Dryden knew of the demon idea?”

“She gave the order. I would have summoned the demons, anyway. Only under Wardens can true magical research continue. A chance to rediscover the secrets of ancient Tevinter.” _There it is again, that feeling that I should **know** what he is talking about. A word that should ring some familiarity to it… but it doesn’t._

“Alright. And the research since then? What was it’s purpose?" 

“Finally asking the real question huh kid. Maybe thinking over what you did just before you walked in her.”

“Shush you. The adults are talking.”

“That’s when I know I’ve got her. Whenever she defaults to my height.” The dwarf jested to Levi.


	5. Character Outline: Hero of Ferelden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've received a couple of requests (surprisingly giving how few people have read this thus far) for some outlines of the stories and the characters. After much thought (like 5 months worth) I have decided to post these every five chapters or so and decided to start with the main character of the story The Hero of Ferelden.
> 
> I will post this in each of these little outlines, but there are going to be spoilers in the description because this gives not only their Overarching/Endgame Theme song but also an outline of their entire arc.
> 
> At first, I did not want to post these, but since I only write when motivated and I am not writing these chronologically (well I am but there are massive holes because writing when motivated and inspired does not mean in order for me.)
> 
> Consider yourself warned for Spoilers this point onward. 
> 
> Also, these may update with time I will add the updated date at the beginning of the post.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character and Story Spoilers:  
> Skip if you are adverse to them, though I promise I wouldn't have added it if I didn't want you to read it.
> 
> Theme Song link is in the title below and in the ending notes.

**Updated: 2019 October 13**

[Strange Love](https://youtu.be/nsu5vtYBsqU) 

It's not that she never wanted to fall in love, quite the opposite she wanted nothing more than to be able to return to someone at the end of the day or mission and know that they would be there waiting for her with arms wide open. She wanted someone who would understand that her life was never one of black and white that she couldn't live in the light or the shadow. Wardens were not given such privileges, not that anyone would remember this because their history was lost to the masses by the time she became a Warden nevertheless the First Warden a decade and some change later.  

That was not to say that she didn't dabble, the Hero of Ferelden is quite the protective lover and since she couldn’t dedicate all this attention to a single person of long term romantic interest it was stretched across those who had the potential of crossing that large crater and those who remained firmly as a trusted ally. 

Constantly underestimated in what she is willing to do to defeat the Blight and ensure another doesn't come during her lifetime or the immediate generations after many consider her a possible threat. Not only had she slaughtered the higher echelon of Senior Wardens who came before her in a coup but she placed not one but two monarchs on their thrones. Some even believe that she was responsible for Orlais Civil War that recently resolved itself and that the Antivan Queens recent assassination attempts are of her doing as well and it doesn't help that she is friends with the current Arishok in Kirkwall, had traveled to their lands and also was an ally of both the Inquisitor and the Viscount of Kirkwall. 

Everybody knows she is a threat and yet her Commanders and subordinates walk freely through the lands. Lower echelon Wardens are not privy to why exactly they are in certain areas more than others and those who have seen fighting recently (post Inquisition) remain tight-lipped, some say by magical force, to not speak about their growing presence in some areas.  

Some will be the first to praise the Wardens, ever since the great elven exodus Tevinter has been pushing for land and new slaves contesting lands that had once been free of their influence. Wardens are not the bulk of the numbers but their presence, experience, and skills have proven vital in key battles. 

All of this is only possible due to the mysterious First Warden, Ferelden's Hero of Ferelden.  **Five years after the elven exodus** their role becomes even more vital when a new enemy joins the battlefield... reinforcing Tevinter's armies. Sentient darkspawn even out the advantage Wardens had on the field and mysteriously their numbers start to fall from the front ranks. Deserters run back speaking of the new atrocities of war, of uncontrolled dark magic and an archdemon.  

It is an entire year after the darkspawn entrance onto the battlefield when her lover receives word from the most unlikely of sources. Corypheus was a danger in his own right, but the stories told of seven and he was only one. Little did anyone know that there had already been another... 

One who had the First Warden's Blood and was the Magistrate that caused the Fifth Blight. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Black Math  
> Name: Strangelove  
> Album: New Game  
> Publisher: Angry Mob Music  
> Original by: Depeche Mode
> 
> For more amazing music similar to the one used in this outline follow the link to go to JennyMusic's page.  
> https://www.youtube.com/user/TechnoJennyni20/videos 
> 
> You will not be disappointed their selection is vast and varied.


	6. This is the resurrection

 “Looks like the Shem was telling the truth."

“Please reference my earlier statement.” She swatted, “And my statement on returning to get some more help.” She followed him and looked around in as much awe as he was in, given the tone of his voice, “These ruins look more human than elven.” Before they could get five feet into the cave a pair of the largest spiders, she had ever seen fell from their web up above.

“Definitely don’t need this in my life. Good thing I’m not afraid of them. And I firmly blame you for this.” She growled at the chuckling Tamlen as they stepped back and shot at their respected arachnids. The creatures died far quicker than she thought they would, noted she had assumed that since they were thousands of times larger than any spider she had faced off against before they would have been that much harder to kill. Luckily such was not the case.

“Simple enough.” 

“We both know that those are not going to be the only bloody things in here.”

“Well, I would sure hope that they weren’t bloodied until after we got to them.” Sometimes she just wanted to slap him.

“Your chances of making it out of here alive without receiving some form of bodily harm from me is waning considerably fast.” The kiss that he stole from her froze the woman in her tracks. She vaguely comprehended the words ‘you love me’ being stated before she was forced to follow after him. Her mind was reeling for information, but her headache was only morphing into a migraine as memories blurred messily in her head.

She was just about at the end of her patience when they turned the corner and found a corpse on the ground. “Well, you’re rather fresh aren’t you.”

“Really Tamlen, you know how to win a girl over.”

“I mean I got the girl, didn’t I?”

“Oh ho ho, you got the girl.” She snarked as she nudged the second corpse with her foot and her best friend, but also maybe boyfriend thing made his way toward the statue in the middle of the hall.

“Weren’t you supposed to be assisting Master Illen today?” Lynette ran smack into the back of Tamlen as he stopped with the sudden revelation. Sue her, she had lost interest in this bloody cave before she had entered. “How did you end up coming with me?” She took pause rubbing her nose for a moment as she weighed her options. _Random conversation, inquiring about my company._ Slowly she felt the smirk begin to set on her face. _You want interesting? random LARPer, I will give you interesting._

“I wanted to be with you, of course.” The memory that followed was completely unexpected and she wasn't any less convinced that she hadn't been drugged before waking up in the forest.

 _“I need you to gather some more fur for the upcoming winter, Lyna. Unless of course you, you have other plans?”_ It faded without a warning and Lynette was left with a now throbbing headache originating from behind her eyes.

“I...thought that might be the case. I’m glad.” There was a hand ruffling her hair once again as he spoke, “Let’s just find whatever is here and get out.” She glared up at him still firmly believing they should do the latter first and the former with some more of their Clan at their side. “We’ll talk later.”

The two of them continued down the halls and were left at another fork in the road. “To the left, to the left.” Lynette sang as she walked on past the silver-eyed blond. “Everything you own in the box to the left” Lynette deflected his curious glance with a wave of her hand as her mind pondered just what exactly got him started with this conversation. _Honestly, don’t we more pressing things to worry about. Like not being caught off guard, again, by steroid-induced spiders._ She wasn't as violent as many people believed she was, honestly before this...whatever this was... she would sooner pick up a spider or roach in a glass and chuck them out the window to continue on with their life. Though that was not exactly a courtesy could give these ones... they kinda gave her no choice but to kill them….because they were a legitimate threat to her survival.

And they were dicks.

Serious Dicks.

“Hey lookie a door.” It was almost instinctual the way she fell down onto one of her knees and pulled out two pins from her hair. She began humming another tune to herself as she played with the mechanism.

“The fact you know how to pick a lock troubles me,” Tamlen admitted from behind her.

“Uh, huh." Was the immediate response that slipped through her lips, before she paused and actually thought about what he had said. "Why?”

“Why exactly would you ever need to know how to pick a lock?” She was biting her lower lip as she strained to listen to the lock and continue the conversation at hand.

“I just thought that my ridiculous Lethallin would one day drag me into some creepy cave that may hold ancient old secrets in it.” He didn’t seem the least bit amused when she glanced back at him. “Honestly, I saw that one day it may come in handy for whatever reason. So I picked it up.”

“How?”

“There are plenty of locked chests in the camp.” With a click, the door was unlocked and she allowed herself in giving Tamlen space and time to think about what she just said. He walked into the room a moment later as she was digging through an old trunk. “I fear that there may not be anything of any interest or use here.”

“Then you go and do things like this.”

“What?” She asked and he merely brought his hand up to the door, “Honestly Lethallin you don’t have to look underneath the underneath with everything that people do.”

“Funny, coming from you.” She paused and knitted her brows together not quite understanding why he was so bothered by this new piece of information. “You are the Keepers favorite, had you been born with the Gift then the whole Clan knows you would have been her  First.” The blonde crossed her arms, “The fact that you were not isn’t the problem. You still have always been the Keepers favorite.”

“I am not understanding what this has to do with anything Tamlen.” She rubbed her hands against her forearms in attempts to quell the gooseflesh. “I have always been well aware of the Keepers interests in me. I always chalk that up to the fact that my parents died when I was young.”

“You think I am jealous Lethallan?”

“That’s what my mind is summing up this whole conversation to, yes.” He shook his head and much to her chagrin stepped forward and hugged her.

“I have known you my whole life Lethallan. I can not simply understand how there could still be things about you that I do not understand.” He stepped back as she began to fuss in his grasp and patted her unruly waves. “I am just amazed that you are still able to surprise me after all these years.” Lynette rolled her eyes both uncomfortable and not at what just happened before slipping past him and exiting the room.

“Hurry up and let’s finish clearing this cave slash burial ground. I’d like to get out of here and back into fresh air as soon as possible.” The blonde ignored Tamlen’s hearty laugh as she exited the room and they navigated back to the fork in the road before going down the right path.


	7. We Chose this Blindly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If this was what retirement felt like Nala both never wanted it to end and wanted something interesting to come stumbling across her little haven. It was growing old, running into either Warden's who wanted to haul her ass back to Weisshaupt or Crows attempting to pick her off to get information on Zevran. It was amusing and adrenaline pumping at first, but now it was just annoying. At least with the Crows, she had to actually keep her wits about her, she didn't know how exactly Joining during the Blight affected her in comparison to others...and there were questionable actions she had taken those first two years that could have thrown a wrench into what was 'normal.' Not that anyone over in Weisshaupt seemed to be aware of either...except the fucker who lived in the library and practically eath, breathed and shate those scriptures. She was positive he was the reason why there were more Wardens coming for her, he must have found something but she had no intention of being anyone's guinea pig. 
> 
> Those were dangers she was aware of and prepared for. Whatever surprise Zevran was giddy to deliver to her terrified to Warden.

"Mi amore, this is that friend I wrote to you about." Sebastian watched her eyes go over him and he felt as if he were a child again under the unyielding gaze of his mother once more. "You do remember, yes? The man wanting to retake his rightful position-"

"I remember." She interrupted lightly though it sounded as if she was getting over a bad cough. "So, you are in need of some allies? Tell me, Shem, why should I bother?"  The Prince in exile didn't know why the elf he had met in passing back in Kirkwall jumped at the idea of introducing him to his friend when they ran into each other on his way toward Starkhaven. Zevran, a friend of Isabella's and therefore someone who could be trusted about as far as you could throw him, was wanted by the Crows based on his only experience with the elf and Hawke. The former crow had been elusive about the whole ordeal and had Isabella not been the one to let it slip one night that he was  _the Crow_ who fought alongside the Hero of Ferelden Sebastian wouldn't have bothered with him.

As for the matter at hand, she was not wrong, if he was going to retake his home then he was going to need allies. And for what little information Isabella had divulged about the former Crow it all chalked up to, Zevran was someone you wanted at your side and not at your back. Varric ran a couple of inquiries about the assassin in an attempt to satiate Hawke's growing curiosity and all of his sources verified that the elf was not someone to wrong. Apparently he was, and based on the losses from the Crow's continuing to try and take him out, is still the best assassin they had on their books. The only blemish on his record was the one that led him to the Hero of Ferelden almost a decade ago to stop the Blight. After the Heroes death much like the remainder of their entourage, he disappeared and it took the Crows a while to track him down...time and time again.

And it was this elusive, albeit sketchy and apparently seductive, legend that was the one talking up the silver-haired woman that lounged before him looking completely and utterly bored out of her mind.

"You have nothing to lose from the endeavor and much to gain." She was living in the forests and seemed more upset with their very presence than anything else. She was Dalish, and Clanless according to Zevran, but the best fighter he had ever had the pleasure of meeting and that was including the Legendary Hero of Ferelden. Any political gain would not win her over, but she had apparently been living away from society for so long the assassin was concerned.

She needed something to do and apparently Zevran felt as if retaking an entire City and throwing an heir back on their throne was just what she needed to snap herself out the hole she was in.

"Desperate." She smirked shaking her head. "Lucky you I am rather bored and my companion with the right sense of mind is out fetching firewood." His eyes scanned the camp and he chided himself for not even considering the fact that she could be out here with someone else. One tent, one bedroll. She was Dalish and likely didn't have a need for such things if Merril was any reference. 

"I told you, yes? Beautiful eyes, chiseled Jaw. Archer with a suicidal goal." The assassin placed his hand on the Prince's shoulder, "She'd be stupid to turn you away and while she is many things...stupid is not one of them." He was in no position to be looking a gift horse in the mouth, nor was he in any position to questions someone's allegiance with him. Zevran had explained that retaking a country was not an easy feat and as someone who had taken a part in such an endeavor previously he could confidently claim that having someone who has no interest in the outcome of your coup was one of the single most important things the Hero had thanked him for. The logic was there, Sebastian just found himself uneasy about how easy all of this was. How such an important decision had been made simply to avoid boredom.

"So you'll help?" He verified.

"Of course." She poked at the fire and it was at this moment that he realized that he no longer found himself on edge. There was a soft smile on her lips as instigated the flame. "Zevran is good at his job. I can speak from experience and say that not a single thing he says isn't well thought out and has its purpose." She began, " Unfortunately for me, he would not shut up about you...after he had first run into you and that devilishly handsome mage." While the words were crass her voice was light and she chuckled even. "Talked the whole gang up, compared you to his Ferelden rag-tag group of misfits. Color me curious... and I am rather bored with life at the moment. Peaceful is nice to an extent," She sighed and rolled her neck, "But it was in this peace that I found I thrive in chaos and war." She admitted as she shifted her amber eyes back to him and away from the fire. "If it were absolutely anyone else I would tell you to sod off, but Zevran is vouching for you and your legitimacy. If we look over to Ferelden the current king is a bastard and he managed to drag the country out of a civil war in the midsts of a Blight that he aided to stop if rumor is true. Zevran still shite talks him, I can only imagine what good  you will do." 

"Have you ever been to Starkhaven?" Any information on the state of his home would be welcome, even if it were years old he had been away for far too long and he knew that information could turn the tide of a battle. 

"A couple of months ago, I cannot say it was as great as Zevran made it out to be." Her sights returned to the flame, "Then again, he had only been there before the whole assassination. Perhaps we can give you a good comparison of the two during our travels." She nodded before she reeled back as if the thought that crossed her mind had stunned her, "Sorry for your loss." Blunt and to the point yet the Prince found himself staring into those amber orbs looking for any indication of genuineness in the words. He nearly regretted the decision to hold her gaze, there was a ferocity behind it as if daring him to question the very thing he had. 

"There is no need for you to apologize."

 

"It's not an apology, ask me one day why I exhiled myself to the wilds. It'll all make sense then."  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I am quickly realizing while typing this out that the 'snippets' are likely going to be told in the third person, but more so in Mahariel's companions perspectives. Her main chapters will be centered more around the elf.


	8. You're a little late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look at this, not a complete chapter but a good chunk of it.

“These things tend to happen when one becomes King or Prince or whatever the hell it is you are.” She replied twirling a finger through her hair without thought as she continued to read the documents and said Royal in question analyzed her every moment. She could always tell when he was looking at her, it wasn’t quite the feeling of being looked down upon as predator would prey… nor was it like the knowing feeling of a darkspawn having felt you out sooner than you could them.

“Not. Quite.” That gained her attention as she slowly looked up from the letter she was reading.

“Oh?” She knit her brows together before the pieces flung into place in her head. “OH! Oh.” She chuckled, set the letter down and leaned back on her arms. “Demands now? That’s interesting. Have they started throwing woman at your feet yet?”

“This isn’t a joking matter.” He tersely stated.

“I never said it was. And I would like to think by now that you understood the levels of my remarks.” She crossed her legs, “But that is aside the point. I do find it humorous. Not the matter of you having children, you’ll make a fine father as you have ruler. But more along the lines that they have any say in matter to of when you are you settle down.”

“They are only looking out for Starkhaven’s future.”

“Or their own.” She snorted, “Not only would another mini-you be prime for them to shape up into their own purposes, especially since for whatever reason raising your own is not a normal thing in human culture when it comes to royals…or really anyone with any amount of money to hire an elf.” She quickly tacked on, “But… whoever the hell it is you chose to marry will have quite the bit of influence, will they not? I figure the same rules that came into play when it came to Alistair are still in play currently…”

“They are, bastards are not to be taken lightly. The current King of Ferelden’s situation is not the usual.”

“I would surely hope not, I would much rather be dead before another Blight shows up. I would hate to have to save everyone from themselves again… and have to watch them start a war amongst one another not a decade later.”

“Typically, bastards are trying to overthrow a pure heir from power.”

“How is that any different from what you did with your cousin?” She cut him off before he could answer, “Or anything different from one of those raising your child to turn him into your enemy. Look. I am not saying I am incompetent or ignorant. I am fully aware of how blood and power can collide. I am just saying that just because you are going to have a child does not mean that he is not going to be a threat himself.”

“You’re under the impression that I am going to have a child. And a boy at that?”

“Eventually, if you want to continue your family as rulers of Starkhaven.” She frowned, “Again. I am not stupid.”

“I never claimed you were. You were the one who managed to get the King of Ferelden to his position, even when he himself was against it.” He acknowledged.

“You never show your whole hand. I am positive that anyone who had met the King before he took throne did not find him a threat, Loghain and Anora included. And with my origins being what they are, I am willing to take quite the bet that the thought of a Young Warden Dale caring about human politics, nevertheless having been the one organizing the entire scheme, in the middle of a Blight hadn’t ever crossed their minds.”

“And it is for that subterfuge and guile that I am turning to you for guidance.”

“Such a shame they sent you away to the Chantry.”

“Excuse me.”

“You’re ill-equipped and definitely lacking experience but you are not incompetent yourself. Given your family ties, your looks and your intelligence you would have made quite the spy and informant. You could have possibly perhaps prevented their own demise and instead of utilizing you, they locked you away and stunted you.” Her eyes were darker than usual and her words brought forth an anger in him for speaking of his family in such a manner. But they were not spoken with malicious intent, yet instead as if she were a mother thinking back of her lost child’s potential.  

“My upbringing has always been a point of contention between us.”

“Yes and it always will be. I don’t know nearly as much as one who was raised within city walls does about any of this political human nonsense. But what I do know and have confidence of are in my abilities in is seeing the potential in others. I have never actually looked at someone and felt such emotions of anger and … and… I cannot think of the word, but anger towards a deceased party as I do when I look at you. That is not to say that you are not a fine man or ruler, nor am I saying that when I first set eyes on Alistair I thought ‘hey, this kid would make a fine king one day.’ Honestly, I was wondering how the hell they thought he could be even the most mediocre of Templars. And this, of course, was before I realized that they simply turned the young and desperate into impetuous, reckless and unsympathetic drones. It doesn’t matter what your capabilities are when you can do what they can to a specific group of people. But the fact of the matter was that Anora’s father not only cost us Ostagar, the humans their king and most their armies, and allowed the Blight to go un-opposed—it was that he just about cost Ferelden everything by placing a bounty on any surviving Grey Wardens all so he could become what? Ruler, The new not King, thing.”

“Regent.”

“Yes, that is it!” She jumped off the table, her blood boiling at the memory of just how difficult one person had made what could have been a solved problem all for greed. “Regent and the fact that anyone thought for a second that I was not going to take that personally after being ripped from my Clan and forced into being the leader to stop not only a Blight, but a civil political war between humans is completely incompetent.”

“Your opinions on past matters aside, what is your guidance for this current problem.” She huffed out her chest a bit and held that breath before releasing it after a pause. She was going to have to give Zevran a stern talking to about how he had thrown her exactly into everything she was trying to avoid by living off of the lands and away from everyone for all those years.

“Firstly, you are going to have to figure out what it is _you_ want out of a woman.” The amber eyed warden began, “What you can and will not tolerate for the rest of your life. Because unless you have some barbaric laws that I am unaware of, you are going to be stuck with this woman for quite possibly the rest of your days.” He nodded insisting her to continue with a slight roll of his hand. “Then look at what Starkhaven needs in a queen, or princess or whatever the hell she will be. Think about the sort of obstacles she will have to face, decisions she may have to make in your stead…if that is how that works. You may want to think about how you want her to be perceived as well. As nice as it would be to not have to put on a face in front of others, you do not have that privilege given your position.”

“You’ve offered more than I had expected.” He chuckled earnestly as he rubbed the back of his neck. “If I didn’t know any better, which I barely do, I would daresay that you have put far more thought into this than most in your position as not only a Dale, but a Warden, would have.”

“Well, someone had to think of the Crown and who was to reign over Ferelden post Blight. A lot of my advice stems off of the thoughts I had to ponder when conceiving the idea of putting Alistair on the throne.” She rubbed the top of her head and groaned, “In addition to that I had to plan out just how far I allowed things to get in order to get him to be the person that his people needed.” A smirk fell on her lips at the memory, the more experienced Warden had been more than willing to turn his back on the crown once his heart was threatened and there had been plenty of chances for that to have remained.

“So the rumors?”

“Oh, turning this around on my life a decade ago? Very well, since you seem quite curious about the matter. After word had been let out about Alistair’s lineage you didn’t need elven ears to hear the gossip about his elven lover vying for throne.” Based solely on Sebastian’s expression the Dale knew that perhaps he hadn’t been quite as informed about the southern lands political landscape. “And while I think I’d have made a wise, but culturally stunted Queen. Valid conflicts of interest would have popped up. It was already bad enough that Alistair was a Warden, a fact that was one of my sole factors as to why he was going to end up on that throne. But his Queen, both a Warden and a Dale? You humans were and still are not ready for that kind of change.” He looked as if he wanted to say something so she continued quickly, “Additionally…The King was not the man he is now, the potential was there, but I doubt he’d have evolved and grown as much as he has ruling or married to his obsession. And as previously mentioned before, I am not and was not in the least bit invested, interested or knowledgeable about how to rule a kingdom. Anora, while a woman I wanted nothing more than to smother in her sleep was better suited for the job and had the possibility of falling in love with that buffoon.”

“And if you were human and noble?”

“Then I would not have been who I was at the time? Who am I to say whether or not that person would be ready, capable or even alive to take the role?”

“Humor me.” He urged, “If there were some spell, or ritual or something.” She knew the Vael had seen her bite her lip and pause in the swinging of her legs. He had noted it as something to ponder on later, he was no stupid man. But just the mention of a ritual… a ritual that would break the rules of the world she lived in.

That would give her a chance she hadn’t had before.

“I’d likely have pondered the idea. But again, I would not have had the least bit of knowledge as to how to rule a kingdom. A human one. I would still very much be an elf, just in a human’s body. Perhaps I would have turned to Arl Eamon and Teagan for advice.” Teagan, it had been a while since his name had graced her conscious. Something had been there, whether or not it was something worth pursuing they would never know. Both were far too caught up with their current affairs than to sit down and toy with the idea of building whatever it was they had going back then.

“For something that you put a lot of thought in ten years ago, you were quick to recall it.” She cocked a brow and turned to face the blue eyed beauty of a man. “Are you sure you haven’t been thinking this over for one reason or another recently.”

“I am unsure as to how you want me to answer. You are King. Or prince or whatever. You are my friend. A friend of Zeveran’s who vouched for you. I am your advisor. Should I not have been thinking of future situations that you may find yourself in and offer my guidance? Because, trust me, if I don’t have to sit down and wonder what we are going to do about those wolves who refuse to leave Bann what’s-his-names crops alone… or fret over if the more radicalized members of the Templars are going to take matters into their own hands and hold the circle captive is going to jump on this mage/Templar war bullshit and hold the Circle hostage. Or whether or not I have to worry about random woman throwing love potions into your food or drinks or gifts they offer. I could sleep more easily. Of that I am positive of.”


	9. I remember years ago

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Running, that seemed to be the only thing she was gifted with as a child. Born with the ability to run long distances, to outrun her problems for short stints of time, to run straight into the flame-breathing breathe of a demon and walk away from it on her terms. It had taken years, but it would seem that all of this was finally catching up to her.
> 
> How does Mahariel, the Hero of Ferelden and Slayer of Uruthmiel solve this problem?
> 
> She does what she does best and runs... runs straight into the depths of hell in an attempt to save the world on the brink of war with Tevinter. She heads into the very place they are to avoid until their final days. And she heads into it with tears running down her cheeks as she realizes that the running must come to an end.

“Commander are you alright?” She slowly turned her attention from the fire and over to her companions, her friends and allies. She shook her head and frowned before standing up,

“I think I am going to go look for some dinner or something.” She walked away without giving them the chance to disapprove. There were too many things going around in her head now that she finally had it back and had the time to sit down and reflect over everything that she had learned and experienced these last few years.

_“Well then as it stands it would seem that we have all reached an agreement, have we not?” She stood up and brought her daggers out, there was no way that anyone in this room was going to leave without some injury and at this point she had a lot more to deal with than she had originally anticipated given the Inquisitor, Leliana and Morrigan’s warnings before she had left. Her eyes turned over to her fellow Warden-Commanders, they were completely outnumbered and likely surrounded. She knew, she fucking knew that she was walking into some bullshit. Her stomach had been churning the entire trip and downright revolting since she walked into the headquarters. “From the looks of it,” She eyed her fellow Commanders up and down. “It would seem like all but possibly Orlais… who is conveniently not here, were also caught with your pants down.”_

_“You don’t need to do this.”_

_“Oh, but we do.” Her Antivan counterpart growled, “What you are doing is wrong and will destroy everything that we have built up.”_

_“Nobody will be able to stop us.” How people could follow and give into these atrocities was beyond her, but as those words left the other Senior Wardens mouth she knew that there would be no reasoning with a good handful of them._

_“I wouldn’t say that.” Their Reaver smiled menacingly twirling her mallet around like it was a staff. “I think you highly underestimate who you are dealing with.”_

_“Did it ever occur to you what would happen if I and the rest of the Commanders turned up dead?” Trevelyan chuckled, “Sure it would take time. But I don’t believe you understand just how connected many of us are.” He gave the First a moment to think it over, “There is no Blight. Or were you simply going to say we all entered the Deep Roads and oh. There they go, the best trained Wardens just happen to fall?”_

_“I am trying to get over the fact that you think now is the perfect fucking time for this.” Nala snapped, “I don’t think you understand just how fucked we are? Or maybe you humans are all fucking morons. No offense.” She shot back to the others, “How the fuck did you think I was going to be alright with this? Was going to be your fucking poster boy to back this?! Loghain, you know what I did with him. He bled, he didn’t die quick. I didn’t gift him that. I had him die a slow painful death and in front of his entire fucking kingdom. It may have been ten years, but bitch… you don’t know me.”_

_“Get them!”_

“Mi amore.”

“Leave. Not now.” The singing it was getting to her, but she didn’t know if it was what she thought it was. She didn’t want to believe it was, it couldn’t be. It was much to fucking soon but it was growing louder. It drew her closer every night, haunted her with ghosts long since buried. Nobody else around her had mentioned it and a part of her was hoping that it was a Blight. A Blight was something she understood, something she could control. She wanted to punch something. Letting the Architect walk away could quite have possibly fucked everyone over.

 Then there were the elves.

Something had definitely happened and while she wanted to know what was going on straight from Hawke and the Inquisitor she knew that the chances of that happening were slim to none. The Inquisition was going to find themselves in quite the predicament for a while and the last thing anyone needed was more unwanted attention. So it was with a heavy heart that she told Sebastian to not revoke them as their allies, but to definitely not be as open and public about everything. He was a more than capable ruler, Prince and whatever the respect they held for one another was like nothing she had ever experienced.

 And that was including the respect she shared with the Arishok, her Sten.

Their network was very much entwined with Leliana’s and the Inquisitions. It had been infiltrated just like they were warned, only unlike how the Inquisition dealt with their agents over there—she and Sebastian chose to keep their enemies close and they were positive that the remaining elves within the Palace and city were likely part of those networks.

Sebastian.

“Mi amore?” She could feel the tears as easily as she could feel her heart split. As warnings from herself and others echoed in her mind. She always jokingly warned that they shouldn’t make promises that they knew they could not keep. She wrapped her arms around her dearest friend as she cried and the decision she had been running from hit her like the charge of a mabari warhound. “Talk to me.” He cooed rubbing the top of the first obvious indicator that something was wrong with her, the top of her now silver mane.

“Impossible.”

“Have you met yourself,” He chuckled squeezing her in his arms. “Nothing is impossible for you. You put your mind to something and miracles happen. Kings are crowned. Archdemons are slain. Darkspawn pushed back. Cities saved. Orders rebuilt. Rebellions won.”

“I was careless. So much time had passed and I forgot.” She admitted with a sardonic laugh. “At least I was not the one who fell for betrayal… that’s far worse.”

“Everyone has their secrets, we all know that. It is part of life. What is going on Nala? What troubles you? Let me know, let me help.” She had never genuinely heard the assassin beg, it was a good sound on him. Way more alluring and tempting than his act, she made a note to let him know about that at a later time. 

“Two months, promise me two months. Then you can go ahead and tell them what I am going to tell you. No sooner than two months though Zevran I will never, **never** forgive you if you reveal anything a moment sooner.” She felt him tense as she rested her head on his chest. Vulnerability was never something she was good at it was the one thing she refused to allow herself to become. Unfortunately that had a direct effect on her trust of others. Trust meant you were handing over something over into another’s hands and allowing them to take control, to do whatever they pleased with what you entrusted to them.

Therefore trust meant vulnerability.

“I promise. I swear on my life and on our bond that I will not utter these words any sooner than sixty nights after…?”

“I leave.”

“You’re leaving?!”

“You’re not to tell anyone. You neither know where or why. You needn’t tell them when you became aware of this if you want. The King.”

“The King? Alistair knows of this?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _My Dearest Leliana,_
> 
> __Now all is done, I feel like it has been ages since I have heard from you and I do miss your lovely face my little nightingale. Word is slowly getting around about what happened with those holier-than-thou assholes and Nyx. I sincerely hope all is well with that and you. There is nothing to say on Solas, nor do I know why elves are leaving. And woman you have gone but are well aware that I have been hearing things since I stepped foot outside of Ostigar. I am likely the last person to ask on whether or not I have noticed anything out of the normal. I can tell you that a large portion of our own population of elves have left, we have a couple of stragglers. I am not quite sure on how many are remaining of their own volition and not for hidden motives. Also, I swear if I have to explain to anyone else that while I don’t know how you have won against that want-to-be archedemon. They are more than willing to go over there so you can go ahead and tell them, I still preach about your voice. I would kill to hear it again, to hear it on my deathbed. Could you do that? Not that I am dying, the thought just crossed my mind and the man writing my letter I am sure – no you might as well continue you’re in this deep.__
> 
> __Anyway, I miss you sincerely my little nightingale.__
> 
> __Much love dalen, Dareth shiral__
> 
> __Nala__


	10. Character Outline: Champion of Kirkwall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There were far too many times when he wished he had someone to turn to, wished he had someone to point him in the right direction or tell him that he was doing the right thing. There were even more times when he wished that he was still running around ignorant to the chaos of the world back in Ferelden, back when he had everything. Back when it was easy to just be, to feel, to live.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character and Story Spoilers:  
> Skip if you are adverse to them, though I promise I wouldn't have added it if I didn't want you to read it.
> 
> Theme Song link is in the title below and in the ending notes.

**Updated: 2019 Oct 13**

[Man of Stone ](https://youtu.be/-TqLOfHDkB4)

There were many things that he gave up to ensure his family's safety, roles and decisions he shouldn’t have had to have made at such a young age but due to the death of his father, he was given little choice.   

His life was one disaster after the other, could you blame him for closing his heart off and fighting to the death to keep his family safe. There is nothing he wouldn't do for them, even after his mother turned around and blamed him for his sister's death. Even if his brother didn't appreciate or understand that everything he did was not to drown him in shadow but an attempt of love to make him a better person.  

Just when things were on the up and up he took the only person he fully trusted with his life with him down into the deep roads. And he got sick, really sick. Had it not been for Anders and the chance that Wardens were down in the Deep Roads then chances were he would be an only child by tragedy. His mother never forgave him, he had cost her both his brother and sister. He needed his brother, he always needed the twins, his life revolved around them... it always had.   

What was he supposed to do now that they were gone?   

He was the life of the party, the one with the witty remarks and the one everyone came to when they needed something. He adopted his rag-tag group as his own but kept them at arm's length. Some could see it and respected his wishes, others saw it and tried to help in their own way. Others were none the wiser too lost in their own causes to realize the consequences of their actions.  

He was never given second chances, why would or should he offer them up.  

Then he was not only an only child but an orphan as well. Surrounded by nothing but constant reminders of everything he had lost, reminders of the consequences of those decisions he had been forced to make. The only thing keeping him going was the sporadic messages from his brother who had survived and was out there carving out a legacy he could call his own.  

He was a kind man, everyone knew that... but there were still some lines that you didn't cross, decisions that affected far too many people outside of your sphere of influence that you shouldn't and couldn't speak for. They didn’t know you, nor you them. It was another rock and a hard place, he knew what he had to do.   

The people of Kirkwall saw this, saw his ability to see beyond simple loyalties. Watched as he crawled from the slums into his old family estate, all the while picking up those around him that he could. Watched as he led their group of misfits through the invaded streets indiscriminately slaughtering those who wished to oppress them. Watched as he, a mage, challenged the Airshok leader of the Qunari and in some people's opinions a possible friend and murdered without hesitation.  

Then instead of choosing one extreme or the other, he took down both zealots lost in their own madness after slaying one he considered a best friend who had chosen to turn the world on its head and bring upon needless slaughtering. Unknowingly setting up the perfect circumstances for a sleeping God to wake and condemn them all to death if needed. 

After all of this, they chose him to be their Viscount if anyone could calm the masses and possibly bring both sides together to stop the martyr's war. He was the perfect example of what they could do for each other, how the world could be a better place. Things were finally looking up for the Champion and then it was as if his hold suddenly forgot everything he had done for them and the Seekers were hunting him down.  

Life as a mage was difficult, he wouldn't fight anyone on this statement.   

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nathan Wagner  
> Name: Man of Stone  
> Album: Single  
> For more amazing music similar to the one used in this outline follow the link to go to JennyMusic's page.  
> https://www.youtube.com/user/TechnoJennyni20/videos
> 
> You will not be disappointed their selection is vast and varied.


	11. Looks straight ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coming soon

“I am just saying that something like this was bound to happen.” Sebastian arched a brow at that statement. She crossed her arms and rested on the day bed, “Forgive me for saying that it was inevitable, but given my background and the elven history.” Realization slowly slipped onto his features.

“You’re telling me that you can relate the history of the elves to what is currently going on with the mages?” It wasn’t an impossible thought, in all actuality the more he thought about it the more he could compare the two… to an extent. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that the elf’s take on those historical events would be different than the ones he had been taught. They were quite literally the two different sides of the war, him being Chantry and she an elf. The Prince made a mental note to ask her at a later time just how exactly she compared the two, it could be an enlightening discussion.

“I’ve exiled myself from most of the world and what was going on but given what you and Zevran have told me about said things … yes. The tales are quite similar, and it is for that reason why I ask you to be transparent with your Circle, lest we find ourselves with a rebellion of our own to have to deal with on top of having just retook your lands.” She had proved to be an exemplary comrade in arms, brilliant tactician and reasonable woman. He found himself trusting her as a complete stranger more so than some of the people who had come to his aide when they found out of his intentions of retaking the throne.

“What Anders did-.” 

“IS not something that I am condoning but is very similar to the time when we Elves turned our back on your humans after you pushed us into our own confinement and your lands were ravaged by a Blight.” The azure prince paused caught once more off-guard by just how knowledgeable and factual in her remarks. “I neither condone that, there needs to be a middle ground, people who are willing to both give and take in order for everyone to live comfortably.” She simply stated pausing for all of a moment before shaking her head. “It seems like your Divine was willing to do just that before the Temple of Sacred Ashes blew up.”

“So, you’ve heard?”

“Who hasn’t? I  _ am _  an elf, Sebastian. I am not deaf nor stupid, quite the opposite if I do say so myself. I understand the complications that are going to follow your Divine’s death. And I can only hope that the people, your people, do not forget what it was she was trying to accomplish out there at the Concave.” He had never doubted her capabilities or even her age since Zevran had been the one to refer her, she looked old enough to wield her bow and the way her blades danced in her hands told him she had slain more than just a few people during her time on this world. What had solidified any concerns he had about her being too young to be of any assistance to him had without a doubt been her eyes, she had the look of someone who had lived two lifetimes. Like she had earned her time to live in the wild and to be left to her own devices, he felt as if he were asking an old veteran to return to the life they had turned their back to. And now as she sat across the room from him basking in the sunlight speaking such words he was once again brought back to all the times when people would question her capabilities, her loyalties to his cause and her origins. 

“Who are you?” Amber orbs lazily returned his gaze as a small smirk played on her features. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind, due to all the times he had seen that side smirk when she had been in the area during such inquiries, that she wondered when he would ask this simple question. It wasn't that the thought hadn't crossed his mind, but all those times before would have only caused further doubt or conspiracy had he turned to her and not answered for himself. She had saved his life twice, the battlefield and war was no time for such questions.

“That is neither here nor there.” Was her response, “I am merely an advisor of yours, official or not. You came to me for aid in retaking what was rightfully yours.” She leaned against the arm of the bed 

 “Now, I am not saying that I enjoy having such a prominent role in human politics and history… but as Zevran had intentionally let it slip up. This was not my first rodeo.” His confusion mimicked many when she used terms that weren’t frequently heard outside of her home. “My first time doing this.” She explained. “You offered me a home and while I am more at home outside of city walls and with the wilderness, you didn’t throw me in chains and lock me up. You never questioned my loyalties for whatever reason. You claim that I can come and go as I please and I am not one to look a gift halla in the mouth.” 

“Are you saying…” Zevran had always likened her to a cat, one that would prefer to lounge about and be left alone but was more than willing to slice into anyone who so much as rubbed her the wrong way. 

“I am saying that your Templars may not be the best guiding hand when it comes to what to do with the mages within their protection.” He couldn’t so much as take in a breath before she had continued, her eyes narrowing. “Because is that not what they are supposed to do? Protect the mages from others and themselves?” She inquired sincerely, “I am also saying that perhaps you may not either, having been right there when whatshisname destroyed the Chantry in Kirkwall. But, you can use this to your advantage to not only gain their trust and deter their thoughts on rebelling, but show that you are a better ruler than many others in Ferelden. Remember what that Divine was out there to do, remain impartial and see both sides. If you can gain their trust you will have mages at your side, there is a risk. I am not stating there is not, but if they feel safe and they understand that they are not confined, per se, but have a home.” 

“Then a rebellion will be the least of my worries.” He confirmed, “Why would they want to ruin something that is in essence what they want to begin with?” 

“Exactly.” 

“I haven’t had many experiences with the Dalish, I will admit. Are most of your people this wise?” 

“I fear not. We are much like humans… I like to believe that those of us who have been forced out of the safety of our Clan may grow to see the world in a different light. The closest one may get within the Clan is the keeper and even then, they can bury their head in the sand and willingly bring upon blindness.” 

“If I may ask… why are you no longer with your Clan?” 

“We are close, Sebastian. I trust you, tentatively so… but the bonds of trust between us are forming. I fear that at this moment I am not comfortable enough to offer you that answer. Fear not, there is no ill intention behind this. It is simply that your not knowing is in both your and my own best interest currently.” 

“Are you a danger to Starkhaven?”

“Quite the opposite.” She smirked, “I just refuse to be a tool in your politics.” She could see the impact and possibility of her words in his expression as his mind attempted to pull threads together that were still too far apart. She leaned back basking in the warmth of the sunlight. She could feel his gaze on her as she relaxed. 

“You do know that you cannot keep this up, right mi amore?” 

“And here I thought that you knew me better than that.” She joked with one of her oldest friends, “I like to believe that if I must I could continue on the rest of my days living how I had before you showed up with a certain downtrodden angry and vengeful Prince.” 

“And now look at our lovely Principito.” 

“Here’s to hoping we skip the pissy teenage years.” 

“Is that not where we are currently?” She couldn’t stop herself from laughing even if she wanted to. Their running joke had always been that Sebastian was their sort of child. They were under no illusion that he was not a fully grown man but given their prior experiences and the Princes sometimes overly cautious, or conflicted, mindset Zevran jokingly called her the Royal Guiding Hand. To this day she still wasn’t convinced that it wasn’t an underhanded insult. “It’s alright mi amore, it will pass with time.” 

“Let’s hope that we get out of this phase before he figures out that he is housing the most sought-after Warden known to man.” She brought her hand up to her temple and rubbed… hard. “This is going to get me even more shit from up north. I was able to bullshit my way into a lecture and a week of ‘How-to’ Warden before, because like it or not… I was a new warden, like days, old when shit hit the fan and the entirety of the Blight fell onto my shoulders. All I had from Duncan was, ‘do whatever it takes to end the Blight.’ So, I fixed Ferelden and all of their problems not because I  _ wanted _  to, but because they were so set on ignoring a bloody  _ Banalhan _ , because of their trivial nonsense.” 

“And it finally comes out.” 

“Huh?”

“I always wondered why it was you never bothered to go back into the arms of that handsome Bann back in Redcliffe. I fooled myself to believe it was because he was related to the King and your falling out was why. When everything in my being was telling me that if anything that would have you in his arms sooner.” The Warden didn’t like how much the assassin knew her, it wasn’t as if she was an easy book to read. She intentionally made herself as mysterious and vague as she could when she dealt with people, a means to keep people at arm’s length and keep them from being able to predict her in any sense of the word. 

“You know me, far too well.” Nala chuckled, “I figured sleeping with a Bann would get me back on the Warden High Commands naughty list. And if I never have to step foot up there again, I can die a happy woman.” She deflected easily enough not knowing whose ears were up against the walls or doors of the room they shared and knowing that because of their prolonged experience with one another there was no reason for her to bring into words memories that she had knocked into the furthest confined of her mind. 

“Here I thought you were raving about how wonderful the weather was.” She chucked a pillow over at him with a laugh. “Perhaps we should take a trip up north, mi amore. I was hoping that it was just you living off the land,” He held up his hands when her eyes narrowed, “Ah. I know, I know. A common mistake for a city elf such as myself, you’ve proven your aptitude in surviving off the land numerous times… but as before I forced myself to believe it rather than the truth.” 

“I feel fine.” 

“And outside of your complexion you appear it as well, but mi amore. Nala…” The Warden-Commander had almost forgotten how much she loved how her name slipped off his tongue. “You look ill. You’re paler than usual and I dare say Grey is not a good color on you.” 

“I vividly remember you saying otherwise.” She tutted naturally enough.

“Armor, yes. Clothing, yes. Skin tone…” She cut him off before he could continue. 

“I feel well. A little foggy, a little tired. I asked about it myself when I was up north, it’s just one of those things that happen to us over time. But since we were on the frontlines of the Blight…” She paused wishing now more than ever that he was a Warden himself, but thankful that he was not. “I am living on borrowed time Kadan. I received more questions than answers for many of my questions and they  _ highly encouraged _  me to stay up there for an indefinite amount of time.”

“So they don’t know.”

“It’s been so long since the last Blight and while we have our records.” 

“I understand.” Her fellow elf stated solemnly. For everything that Zevran was the man was no idiot. The only times she would claim that he was would be when he first attacked her, excusable since he didn’t know her and was just doing his job and the few times a comment of his got them into hot water on multiple occasions, also excusable cause her mouth has gotten her into more trouble than not. 


	12. What are We Waiting for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These were always the best dreams, the ones that seemingly had nothing to do with the world you lived in. The ones that brought back the people you had lost long ago unable to go back and fix things like you could in a game. Lynette had just wanted to drink her anxieties away, they were deploying soon and she couldn't help but wonder if they were going to come back. It felt like they had been at war her entire life, they definitely had been her entire adult life. So waking up in the woods after what she could have only anticipated as a good night out, shouldn't have been of any concern. Except, you know. They weren't stationed anywhere near the woods...and she couldn't even remember finishing one drink.

At this point, she wasn’t too sure what to make up of her current living conditions. Waking up on the ground had been a start because the last time she checked she was still a month out before being deployed. And the last thing she remembered was drinking with two of her best friends, one of which she hadn’t seen in years and she had decided to surprise them for the other birthday. It was nice if not a little blurry toward the end of the night. 

Still, she couldn’t help but feel as if somehow this was all her fault.

They always trained you on what to do on the rare chance you found yourself in unknown territory, though she was almost a hundred percent sure that being blatantly drunk and waking up with a pounding headache was not mentioned anywhere in those lessons. Shaking her head the female stood up and found that she had managed to pass out near a fire of sorts, or rather she was hoping that she didn’t start the fire while drunk because **that** could have ended horribly for everyone involved. Sitting up on the balls of her feet the blonde reached out and placed her hand over the fire. “Cold.” She grumbled to herself as she stretched out and inspected her surroundings.

The most notable thing she noticed was the sheer amount of trees in the area, “Where the fuck did all these trees come from?” Lynette took the time to pause and pinch the hell out of her arm, multiple times...after the fifth, her right ear twitched back at the sound of rustling brush and a hand fell onto her shoulder. Reflexively, she grasped the wrist leaned forward and hurled the invading perpetrator over her shoulder. Keeping a grip on their wrist with her left-hand the soldier contorted herself in a matter to land a side straddle before stretching out and yanking their arm toward her stomach, successfully locking the armbar. 

“Lethallan?” The blonde paused, “Lethallan it’s me Tamlen.” There was a moment of pause, the voice was familiar but the name brought no clarification. Conflicting emotions were flickering in her mind, but finally, the woman let go of his arm and rolled over back out of his grasp straight toward the bow she had spotted in her earlier stretch. “Were you honestly expecting to be ambushed this close to Camp?” She honestly couldn't believe what she was seeing and was now fully convinced that she was in some super deep drunken dream.

“One can never be too sure.” She offered cautiously as he stood up and stretched out his shoulder. 

“I’d like to think these forests are safer than most other places in the world and between the two of us we would know if there were any lurking dangers.” He seemed to toy with his next words for a couple of seconds before speaking again, “what was that Lethallan?” 

“Spur of the moment?”  _Are his ears fucking pointed? I definitely drank way too much._ The blond-haired silver-eyed, apparent, elf shook his head and smiled. Lynette was not going to admit to herself or anyone how gorgeous of a smile he had. She would vehemently deny it. Especially since these feelings of attraction carried on a layer of guilt, was she not just envisioning someone else when she looked at him.

“What are you doing out here anyway Lethallan? Shouldn’t you be out collecting things for Master Ilen?” An image of a friendly older looking pointed eared man flickered in her mind's eye. She knew the man, but unlike Tamlen, there were no twisted vines of guilt that wrapped around her heart. 

“Do you hear that?” Not only was she trying to not talk about things she knew absolutely nothing about, but the three idiots making a ruckus through the quiet forested area clearly never been given any Noise, Light and Litter discipline.

“Come on, this way. I know just how to cut them off.” Without so much as a warning, the blond was gone and reflexively Lynette took chase after him. It honestly reminded her of the few times she had chased out drunken idiots who made a run for it in the middle of their parties. If there was one thing she took pride in it was not her sprinting capabilities, but she could run for hours if necessary. 

Sue her, taking chase came naturally to her.

 Free, that was the only way to describe how she felt as she danced between the brush of the forest. The way the wind whipped through her hair, the way her heart was pounding against her chest and the hypersensitivity she had to everything around her. The only time she recalled ever feeling like this was when their convoy had been ambushed during her first deployment. 

It all felt so natural. 

She felt as if she were supposed to be here chasing after the blond that was ahead of her leading them toward their target. This wasn't a feeling she could have claimed to have felt before this alcoholic induced dream. She was always hiding behind a mask, being the person she knew others needed her to be in order to get the job done or to shape them into the people she knew they could be. 

“It’s a Dalish!” She bit the inside of her lip annoyed, but not quite sure why she was feeling that way as she drew her bow from her back and slowed herself to a more reasonable pace as the blond’s voice tickled her ears. 

“And you three are somewhere you shouldn’t be.”

“Let us pass _Elf._  You have no right to stop us.” Her brows drew together in confusion, a piece of her mind was comparing this to those seldom LARPing scenarios she found herself in at conventions. Had she not already been fully convinced that she was out cold, possibly on the floor drooling up a puddle somewhere, she would be completely content with writing all of this off as her being at some sort of Lord of the Rings, or Fantasy Convention.

“Yeah, we will see about that. Won’t we.” She had her bow pointed in the same direction as he the second she saw him through the clearing.  _They are unarmed and rather pathetic looking._ Lynette thought to herself as she stood next to the first stranger she had run into since waking up. She found herself trying to place where she had seen these three humans, they always said that the mind never created new features but instead pulled from its subconscious banks while dreaming. 

“What do we have here…” Even she could hear the unnatural pause in her voice but chose to look over to Mr. unnamed human instead of making an ass of herself any further.

“--Bandits, no doubt.”

“We aren’t bandits I swear.”  _I really wish I had their hair color._ She thought with a pout as she lowered her bow a bit, a nudge from blondie had her raise it back up. Half paying attention she was able to piece together that the little band had been running away from some cave nearby they had found. _B_ _ullshit, I know these forests like I do the Vallaslin on Tamlen and Fenarel’s faces._ She couldn't honestly explain where the thought had come from, but she had imagined the intricate designs on Tamlen's features just as he turned to face her.

“What should we do?”

“They are clearly unarmed.” When she was met with the exact design she had envisioned in her mind her voice wavered. Her head was throbbing and she knew if she wasn't careful she would be cursed with a raging migraine. “Aren’t you more curious as to what a couple of unarmed  _human children_ are doing running around--or rather  **_what_ **they are running from?” She couldn't keep the smirk off of her lips even had she wanted to.

“Does it matter.” There was something wrong, out of character, with the way he had said that and she glanced to him with a frown in response, “Hunting or Banditry. We will have to move the camp if we let them live.” Cursing she knew he was not wrong, but it almost felt as if the thought of killing them didn't bother the blond in the least. She was no pacifist by any means. She had been called cruel and cold far too many times in her life to be under any illusion otherwise.

 “I can...understand your logic.” She didn't want to go and add any fuel to the fire that may have been trying to fuel in his mind. Though she completely understood the logic behind it, letting them go meant that they would have to move. As unassuming as the three appeared...

“I--Uh, look.” Their eyes turned from one another and back to the trespassers. “We didn’t come here to cause trouble. We just found a cave.” The brunette male responded on the far left before the redhead picked up the engine.

“Yes… A cave! With ruins, I have never seen!” She didn’t like where this was going, they were most definitely not setting a good case for themselves and she was running out of reasons to defend them if they continued down this path. “We thought there might be….uh…”

“Treasure. So you are more akin to thieves than actual bandits.” If she could face-palm, she would have right here." Tamlen too seemed as if he was on his last sliver of patience. 

“Ruins?” The blond offered her a passing glance, “What? I’m curious, I’d like to see these Ruins.” She loosened the grip on her arrow and shrugged over trying to non-verbally perk his interest.

“So would I. I’ve never heard of ruins in these parts.” 

“Here! I have proof.” Her arrow was taut once more as the _human_ stepped forward. “We found this just inside the ruins.” If this was one of her dreams the chances of him opening up his tunic and revealing a tunic were highly probable. It was a fear not many of them openly expressed, but there was nothing you could bring to a bomb fight and win...except for a wide birth and both she and Tamlen were nowhere near far enough for her to feel comfortable with the possible threat. An arrow wouldn't do shite but she still glared and watched as Tamlen stepped forward to take the item in question. 

“ **Written Elvish?!** ” His raised voice caught her off guard and she felt as if she had a mini-heart attack. 

“That’s practically unheard of.” Echoes of an elderly voiced bounced around in her mind. They were people who shared this history orally, there was not much left after the fall of their great city. She was curious by Tamlen's interest in the artifact but held her bow steady, she took pride in being able to talk to people in their native tongue and she couldn't help but wonder if her mind had either built up this Ancient Language out of one of those or created it's own.

“There is more in the ruins, we didn’t get too far in though.” Lynette narrowed her eyes as the tollest albeit youngest sounding looking down at the ground and shivered.  _There are more_ _in the ruins, you boob._ “There was a demon! It was huge, with black eyes!”  _Nope, I am a proud member of the Supernatural fandom and that description sounds exactly like a demon._ When she heard her comrade scoff Lynette could feel her stomach churn.  _I don’t want to be the people in the first five minutes of the show, they **always** die_ _._

“A demon? Where is this cave?”

"You can't be serious." She grunted with no acknowledgment. 

“Just off the west, I think.” Red looked over to his other companions who nodded. “There is a whole cave in the rock face and a huge hole just inside.”  _Stop talking with your hands._ Lynette frowned as she watched his hands dance in front of him.

 “Well? Do you trust them? Shall we let them go?” Tamlen's genuine question forced the words to slip past her lips without much thought.

“Oh, now you want my input.” Blondy looked like he was trying to hold back a smirk for the sake of keeping up his bravado strong-man appearance. “You scared them enough as is.” Her bow fell as she shook her head.

“Run along now,  _Shems_ … and don’t come back until we Dalish have moved on.” Tamlen waited until they retreated into the treeline before dropping his bow, only when they were far enough away did he turn to her and she knew from the twinkling of his eyes and that saucy smirk there wasn't a damn way she was going to successfully talk him out of doing something stupid. “How about we check out that cave?”

“Absolutely not,” Lynnette growled as she placed her bow back on her back.  _Tamlen,_  the name just hit her along with a wave of memories she didn’t recall ever having, walked up and showed her the statue she hadn’t bothered looking at.

“Do these carvings not make you curious?” The skin on her arms began to form goose-flesh as her eyes scanned the markings on the item. There was something about all of this that made her want to throw up, she was getting the worst case of Deja Vu. There had only been one other time in her life when she felt this strongly against something. She wanted nothing to do with that statue, she just wanted them to go back to the Camp and act as if none of this had happened. To tell Fenarel about their adventures and run-in with humans as they started packing up the camp. 

“We need to inform--” 

“The Keeper?” He finished for her bringing a hand up to ruffle her hair earning him a strong glare. “You are still as easy as a book to read, Lethallan.” Tamlen shook his head and stashed the artifact in his bag while freeing her hair from his offending hand. “She might be interested in these carvings, but let’s see if there is anything more before we get excited.” Lynette crossed her arms physically pouting to which Tamlen smiled, actually smiled. “Besides we are already here. Now, they did say it was to the West, no?"

It didn’t take long for them to navigate their way through the forests avoiding most of the wildlife when she was hit with a sense a second of deja vu. Only this time she felt as if she knew this forest inside and out. She could recall running through these trees a fortnight ago laughing and on the hunt with Tamlen, competing to see who would bring back the larger haul for dinner. A month or so ago when the three of them ran down to the nearby river to catch some fish. 

Then she ran straight into his back. 

“Seriously?”

“Wolves straight ahead,” Tamlen replied as he pulled an arrow out of his quiver and began to draw it back.

“We are not killing the wolves.” Tamlen looked over his shoulder at her as she pushed down his bow. “There is no need.” This was not happening, she was putting her foot down.

“There is always a need for resources Lethallan. Their pelts will keep us warm when we find ourselves battling the cold. Their bones-”

“We are either killing the wolves or searching the caves...not both.” Tamlen chuckled to himself as he set his bow and arrow back in their respectful holds to stand and place his hands on her shoulders. "We are leaving are we not? Likely heading up north where it is warmer, no?" The Soldier was ignoring butterflies she felt as the two of them stare one another down.

 “You’ve always had a soft spot for them in your heart, haven’t you.” Lynette maneuvered out of his grasp and scowled not liking how her head came up to his chin.  _Tall sonuva bitch._ He laughed, “Well let’s get going!” Begrudgingly she set off after him.

They only had to continue down the path for them to find the offending opening in the forest, Lynette took pause and bounced her weight back and forth. A clear indicator tick of hers for anyone who had deployed with her about how anxious or unsettled she was with a situation. Tamlen paused a couple of paces in front of her and turned to speak.

“This must be the cave.”

“What gave you that idea...the welcoming sign?” She grumbled as she closed the distance between the two of them, Tamlen swatted at her as he spoke.

“I don’t recall seeing it here, do you?”

"No, which gives us all the more reason to be cautious--” She was cut off when a hand fell on top of her head and ruffled her hair… again.  _Look, you little-tall shit._

“Always the careful one.” She flailed and managed to break free to glare at him. “Fine, but I am not going back until I know it’s something worth making a fuss over.”

“And this is where I disagree.” He gave her a look and she groaned. “I know next to nothing about what we should even be looking for! And I am sure that you are no better than I. The Keeper needs to be here.” When he didn’t look convinced she continued, “Plus we  **_know_ **these woods like the back of our hands Tamlen, the fact that two of the Clan’s hunters came across an unknown cave seems like reason enough to turn back and inform the Clan.”

“And if we were to bring her out here all for nothing? Or if she were to enter and then be slain by a creature we could have taken care of before her arrival?” Lynette groaned hating just how much his logic made sense and worked in his favor. It was so much easier to argue with people and make decisions when you were the leader based on either experience, specialization or rank.

“I still don’t--” She didn’t get the chance to refute the look in his eye told her everything she needed to know. He wasn’t going to change his mind and she wasn’t sure if she could do anything to change that. Not liking the idea of anyone entering any unknown area on their own, nevertheless an old friend, meant that she was going to be dragged along into this even if she wanted nothing to do with it.

“Come on lets at least scout the area out.”

“Don’t--” Lynette tried to cut him off bringing a finger up in warning, but he continued anyway.

“How dangerous could it be?”  _Say that,_ She finished internally as she watched him walk into the cave giving her no choice but to follow. Laughing in the face of danger or the fog of the unknown was just about the single stupidest thing you could do. 

“Do you not recall them talking about a Demon! A black-eyed Demon!” She chased after him with a growl unable to ignore the sense that this may be Karma for something she had done in the past.


	13. It couldn't wash the echoes out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From one shit show into the next Nala can't seem to catch a break. If she wasn't sure about it earlier it quickly becomes apparent that while they may be some of the highest-ranking members they were all still aware of this concerning threat. All the while the Dale cannot help but feel like there is something far more sinister going on than any of the Commanders are aware of.
> 
> She feels almost drawn to the First and she can't help but feel sickened at the thought.

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” She growled looking at the First Warden, “I was maybe a week into being a Warden when absolutely everything around me went to shit. Loghain decided that instead of stopping a Blight that was his time to become the leader of Ferelden because apparently Anora. To hell with that woman by the way, who had been ruling alongside Cailan and honestly ruling in his absence to play hero couldn’t possibly rule a country on her own. The only guidance I was given was during my walk to Ostagar with Duncan who informed me that Wardens were to do absolutely anything to ensure that the Blight was ended… if I didn’t fix your humans broken bloody system, elect a new King of Orzammar, Fix the broken Circle and resolve the issues within the Dalish Clan-- we would not be having this conversation and hopefully everyone north of the border would have gotten their shit together quick enough to stop the Blight their damn selves and push them out of the South which they would have had a stronghold in.” She roared standing up from her kneeling position and glaring directly at the Council. “I don’t give a fuck about your rules, I did what I needed to end the Blight. And if I am not mistaken from the little information I did know about them before I was forced into this position it was a fucking elf who saved your ass four hundred years ago too. I didn’t ask for shit. I didn’t ask to be made Queen, nor the Mistress of the King of Ferelden—who had offered it quite publically to me in front of his new wife. I didn’t bitch when you pulled me back from Par Vollen to clear out Amaranthine. I didn’t even bring these--.” She held up documents from the Queen or Orlais and other documents that they had dug out of King Calain’s chest back at Ostagar throwing them toward the Chamberlain of the Grey.

“I’ve already been made the Warden-Commander of Ferelden, foremost by the King of Ferelden himself and finally acknowledged by you not ten minutes ago when this whole shite show started. If you are going to retract my rank you better do it now, if not I have a fucking order to rebuild.”

“You will not speak—"

“I will speak however I damn well please!” She could see the Rivaini Warden-Commander and Neverran Warden-Commander grin. “As far as I am concerned you—the very fucking Order whose duty it is to stop a Blight turned your back on Ferelden. Noted, it would have taken time for word to reach of our demise at Ostagar to hit you. But what of before? What of the correspondence Duncan had with you guys about there being an Archdemon? Why weren’t more men sent, if we had the numbers there would have been no fucking need for Loghains traitorous arse.” The temperature in the room immediately dropped. “Here I am the first Warden to survive slaying an archdemon and I bet that it is for this sole fact as to why you don’t believe it was an actual Blight… even if my previous Warden-Commander told you otherwise. Shite, maybe it’s cause I am an elf, everyone else seems to be set on believing one thing or another because of my Origins and Race. You’ve received my documentation, my reports and the other griffin shit you have asked for. Believe what you will, I don’t have time for this. While the rest of you fuckers have thirty years –apparently my arse is on a shorter time limit to figure out a cure.”

“There is no cure.”

“Fenedhis! The way I look at it I may know more about your own Order than you do. I intend to utilize the resources here for a month or two, then I will be out of your hair. My Constable is more than capable of maintaining Amaranthine while I am away.” She couldn't help but wish that she was dealing with Nate right now, he was a pain in the ass but at least he was intelligent. 

“Is he not the Arl of Amaranthine as well?” Her eyes flickered over to the Navarran Commander unsure as to which side exactly most of them sat on. She couldn't give two shits, it hadn't seemed like such a big deal before but some further research found that perhaps giving away her blood was not the brightest move. She hadn't even gotten around to explaining that the darkspawn had evolved and the more she spoke with the First the slimmer the chances of her even bothering.

“Yes… Yes, he is, because if you haven’t noticed… which I am well aware that you have, I am an elf and everyone is racist as shit. Additionally, those were his lands before his idiotic family member decided that murdering a whole different family, the Cousland’s, and siding with Loghain was the best way for him to gain power. Warde Howe is far more adept and skilled in political matters, he doesn’t have my ears and he is a loyal and dedicated Warden... funny since a lot of those who originally had the intention of killing me seem to be the most loyal people I know." She muttered the last thing to herself than to anyone in particular, "Nathaniel Howe would make a fine Warden-Commander if you ever find the reason to drop my status – or put a bounty on my head. There is a little something that I want nothing more than to keep to myself, but giving the fact that I may end up dead in a ditch as soon as I walk out of those doors I would like to let my fellow Commanders know of my recent findings in Amaranthine.”

“ There is no need, for there is no such thing." 

"I'd like to hear what the Commander would have to say." Her Antivan counterpart interrupted scowling, "Since she has seen the most combat with the darkspawn in mass any advice would be appreciated." Nala tried to ignore the way that his accent made her heart flutter and mentally cursed Zevran and their mutual flirting over the past year." 

 "The Ferelden Warden-Commander reported talking coherent Darkspawn during her time in Amaranthine." The Warden-Chamberlain explained to the interested parties in the room. 

"Coherent as in with the ability to strategize?" Her expression softened at their genuine interest, she could see the skepticism in some of their expressions but she had a foot in the door and even if they didn't completely believe her. 

"It has not progressed to that point yet, I don't know the origin of this sudden change in the foul creatures either... I was hoping that there would be something within our archives to shed some light into the matter." She lied easily enough. 

"Talking Darkspawn, I’ve never heard of talking Darkspawn.”

“Well bitch, they exist.” She interrupted simply, it may not have been this particular Orlesian Wardens fault but no amount of whining and saying she wanted to go over and help change the fact that they all chose to stay on their side of the border. “And I know that is something that the First Warden, Chamberlain and probably a couple of the figureheads up here are quite aware of.” 

She remained silent as the others began going over the reports she had copied for them of her time in Amaranthine, edited, of course, her apparent paranoia and distrust over the bureaucracy of a past life was still warranted in this one. She watched as the First Warden watched her from the corner of her eye, the hairs on her arms were standing on end and everything in her being was telling her to get as far away from that man as possible. She was quite possibly stumbling into some shit that was going to send her to an early grave. 

"Also, is missing out on these summonings just a normal thing?" She interrupted, "Waiting an additional week for the missing Commanders gave me the opposite impression, but not a single one of you have bothered to even voice concern over their absence." She leaned back into her seat and let out an audible sigh, " I have no idea what's going on with the Warden-Commander of Orlais’s situation if it's karma sending hordes of darkspawn in their direction I couldn't be happier... but alas I doubt. The Creators don't smile upon me." 

"I am getting a distinct feeling that you are going to be a good ally to have." Nala made a note to get to know the Nevarran Commander, if for nothing else than to catch a couple of drinks with whenever they found themselves in the same country. "Larius is the most dedicated of the lot of us. You had to travel through the Marches to get here and you've got the look of someone who knows more than they have let on." The blonde winked in response and crossed her legs under the table. 

 "I want to start with that I do not have the details as to what the fuck is going on down there." She prefaced garnering the undivided attention of everyone in the room. "He was busy interrogating information out of what could be one of the oldest Darkspawn – if not the oldest Darkspawn we have ever laid hands on as an Order. A creature that made me sick to my stomach the closer I got to it. That  _whispered_  things to me and tried to  _influence_  my mind." She was shivering and gaining gooseflesh from just talking about it, "And this was just after a couple of days of stay there. He asked me to come in his stead because they were on the verge of something. Warden-Commander Larius didn’t feel comfortable sending any documentation on their progress because of the nature of everything going on.”

“Report.” She abhorred the High Constable, he was nothing but a glorified figurehead and she was about to tell him where he could shove his order when the Firs Warden's eyes narrowed and she thought better of it. 

“Let me backtrack. So I was assigned to Amaranthine, correct, not six months after I finished dealing with the Blight in Ferelden. The lands were plagued with Darkspawn and it was just easier to promote and send me back to Ferelden than send someone who may have been more experienced lore and historical wise to deal with the situation. I dealt with the Blight alone in Ferelden, why the fuck not should I be the one sent to Amaranthine." She ranted, knowing this had absolutely nothing to do with them and everything to do with Alistair. Who else was he supposed to turn to with something like this, especially after figuring out what happened with his brother's correspondence to Orlais and having found Duncan's own concerned letters and requests for reinforcement scattered around during their travels? "Whatever. I never understood your human logic anyway. I arrive at the Keep to find it under attack and much like my time in Ostagar completely alone in my status as a Warden, for every one of my peers were slaughtered in some ambush attack on the Keep. Needless to say, my expectations of the order and its members - specifically the ones who reported from Orlais to Amaranthine are non-existent. Initially, I had thought that this had to have been some sort of coup, it wouldn't have surprised me I didn't know the political climate and the only thing I had been told was that Howe had been the prior Arl... and he was an arse, so maybe someone came in to clean house. Whatever." She rolled her neck popping it in a few places as memories of that first night back flickered in her mind. "It became more apparent that this was not the case as I made my way through the keep and while it was unheard of -- I had been at Ostigar and this looked a lot like that. Only there was a living breathing archdemon then... but here I was facing this same carnage after I had physically slain Uruthmiel." She could see the others reach the same terrifying conclusion she had, "And yet here I was walking through the aftermath of these Blighted monstrosities having seemingly been organized enough to  **plan an ambush on a fortified Warden Controlled Keep**.” Nala shook her head cursing her luck, "For good reason, I was concerned and thankful that it took me quite some time to return from Par Vollen or I may have been among the casualties.”

“You did not report this.” She was going to take pleasure in finding new ways to torture this man in her dreams.

“I wonder why. Maybe it was because I was immediately ordered to the Vimmark Mountains without delay? And this was my first correspondence with any of you fuckers since I had joined the Order?” She noted the confusion on the Antivan Warden Commander's face, “Ah, yes. It wasn’t the First who sent me back to Ferelden. Sorry for the confusion, the King of Ferelden asked for my help. Or rather ordered. I was returning mostly to tell him where he could shove it in the most painful way possible. Anyway, the Keep was completely taken over and imagine my surprise when after making my way up the building to clear out the lingerers I come across a Darkspawn who could speak… coherently, giving orders. I hadn’t seen the creature, no. I heard him as I came out of the building and onto a balcony.”

“It’s not unheard of…” All eyes darted in anger toward the Chamberlain of the Grey.


	14. Make the Sun Shine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wasn't that she was against any particular religion, honestly, she thought they made great guidelines for those who needed... you know guidance. What she hated the most was that she couldn't hold an open discussion with someone about it, she couldn't ask genuine child-like questions in an attempt to better understand just how that particular person related their studies of their religion to the world. How they used it to guide them in their daily lives.
> 
> Unfortunately, that was not a route she could avoid here, everything was so different she was going to have to step on a couple of toes in order to get even the most basic understanding of anything. Luckily for her, Dale's weren't expected to know jack shite about the shem world... or be able to read. Both opportunities she had absolutely no quarrels with exploiting

"Sten isn't too happy with the change of plan, is he?" Nala groaned at her genuine inquiry as she fell on her arse to set next to the Chantry sister before leaning into the woman with a second groan. 

    "I swear it is like prying teeth out with priers, that one. I don't think anyone knows any more so than I just how important it is to end the Blight. But what am I to do? March over to the Archdemon, wherever the fuck he may be and nicely ask him to roll over and die?" Leliana laughed, "I can hardly get Patton to play dead because..." She deepened her voice. " **_ Who the hell would keep your dumb arse alive? _ ** _ " _

__ "Is that what he told you?" Leliana gaped with a hand over her mouth as said Mabari in question glanced back over at them from his snoozing position on the other side of the fire. 

    "Not in quite so many words, but yes." The two of them sat like that as Morrigan cooked up the rabbit they had caught on their way back toward Honnleath. Sten was glowering where he had set his tent down and Alistair was looking exceedingly more uncomfortable the longer he sat on the other side of the fire from the Qunari. 

    "So.... in other news. What was someone like you doing in the Lothering Chantry?" The elf shifted to where she was laying on the sister's lap, staring up at the changing sky as the words slipped past her lips without thought. 

    "What is meant by 'someone like me.'" Returning her attention to the redhead Nala easily found that gleam in her eyes. There was far more to this Chantry Sister than she was led to believe, not that this innocent little façade of hers was not adorable. But she was a member of their traveling party... there were only two Wardens and she was now aware of a bounty that was placed on their heads. The chances of a Sister who happened to be skilled in fighting also located in that tavern? Slim. And while she  _ wanted  _ to believe that Leliana believed this vision from the Maker to help them—again it was far too much of a coincidence. Or perhaps a planned cover. 

    "You know, a beautiful charming woman like yourself."  

    "And there were no beautiful, charming women in the cloisters do you think?" Nala shrugged having already explained in a previous conversation that Lothering was the first and only Chantry she had stepped foot in. Leliana chuckled and began running her hands through her unruly hair. "You would be wrong. There were many lovely young initiates in the cloister. All of them Chaste and virtuous." Nala knew she was gaping, but honestly, how could she not with how  _ those  _ words left the  _ Sisters _  mouth. "It added to their mystique because they were forbidden and forbidden fruit is the sweeter...no?"  _ How this woman sold me on the woman of the Chantry being the perfect prey is beyond me. A part of me knows that I should feel dirty thinking about the things she has brought forth into my mind with those words—but there is no way that I am leaving this as a win for her. Two can play this game.  _

    "What about your fruit? Is it forbidden?" She was mortified the moment she realized what she had just said, but her face remained smirking. 

    "My fruit? I- oh- I- I can't believe I am having this conversation." She could feel the smirk on her own features grow wider as the red-head cleared her throat. "But...no I did not take those vows. The Chantry provides succor and safe harbor to all who see it. I chose to stay and become affirmed."  

    "You've lost the Dale again. Affirmed?"   

    "We affirm our belief in the Maker, in Andraste and the Chant, but other than that there are no vows taken." 

   "Fair, so what did you do before." 

    "I was a traveling minstrel in Orlais. Tales and Songs were my life. I performed and they rewarded me with applause and coin..." Nala brought her hands up as if she were shooting a bow and then stabbing someone with knives. "And my skill in battle? Well, you pick up different skills when you travel yes, yes of course."  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got quite a bit of the camp dialogue between the characters written.
> 
> Nothing juicy length (3000+ yet) but I might just update these as I add to them.


	16. To Hold Your Hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ferelden is reeling from the loss of their Queen and the sudden reappearance of a Hero long since believed dead. Sebastian a known ally of Doshiel and the first to openly accept Wardens within his walls is bombarded by everyone about his relations to the woman, her identity and opportunities. Anora's body lay waiting for burial as her husband storms into an old ally's room to demand answers. The evasive Warden-Commander offers what she can but withholds plenty, not ready for the world to see her for who she truly is or prepare them for the unseen enemy.

“I have a son.” 

“I am well aware.” 

“And you didn’t tell me.” 

“We both understand the complications of such information getting out, you more so than most I would like to presume. Nevertheless, he isn’t human. Morrigan is taking care of him and will sooner burn your whole Country alive than part with him and I for one would join her in that endeavor.” His poker face had gotten better over the years, something she was sure she would never have the pleasure of thanking Anora for. Her body had only started to get cold just the other day, while the King was doing damage control around the Court and trying to calm the citizens of Denerim she had kept mostly to her own or Sebastian's room. The first hours were the worst, she wasn't sure if she had completely burnt that bridge with the Prince and she was still waiting for the tongue-lashing that was bound to be heading her way.

“It’s good to see you.” Was Alistairs fumbled attempt after a couple of moments of silence, it kinda reminded her of the last time they had been left alone in similar rooms a decade ago. It had lead to the child that had been mentioned the moment he stormed into the room.

“I wish I could say the feeling is mutual.” She offered earnestly, she was here on business even if her identity had been revealed and now surely passed through loose lips. Showing up on the day that the Queen died probably wasn't the best route things could have taken and she was sure that there were going to be people talking about this being some sort of convoluted plan of hers to win the King back.

 She was still an elf was she not? “You’re different. You have to admit, I was right.” She smirked leaning back on the wall near the fireplace crossing her arms. 

“That tends to happen when you are thrown onto a throne.” He paused, “You should be dead.” She quirked a brow at that,  _ talk about blunt. Then again I suppose he always had been.  _ “I’ve learned quite a bit from some of the other older Wardens. Those who live during the Blight typically die sooner than the given 30 years.”  

“Do we, now?" Not knowing when he had gained this information didn't help her narrow down why he had bothered asking. A younger, much younger, ten years younger version of him could have been asking for all the wrong reasons. Which in this case wouldn't have mattered, he could have still used it to better understand his own mortality...eventually. An older version of himself, or Anora, would have found out to see just what kind of timeline they were looking at. "You and I are literally the only surviving Wardens who fought in a Blight. And I survived slaying Uruthmiel." She rolled her wrist at the explanation, "I believe it is safe to say that we are rather bad at following the 'norms' would you not agree? That is neither here nor there since we are both standing here nevertheless.”

“What happened?” His eyes narrowed at her and she mimicked the expression. There was no anger behind hers though, suspicion yes. They had ten plus years of shite to catch up on, she had done quite a bit in that amount of time and the last thing she wanted to do was give up any information that he didn't necessarily need to know at the moment.

“What needed to be done.” She answered after a moment of thought. “We did what needed to be done. We always do what needs to be done.” She had a good feeling that she knew what he was talking to, it was the one thing that had bothered him from the moment her body had gone missing. While he continued with his Royal duties he kept ears and eyes out on the search for her... according to Leliana.

“And you dropped off the face of the planet. Nobody would tell me anything.” He frowned placing his arms behind his back, “I was under the impression that you were dead, especially after speaking with Weishaupt.” Her eyes narrowed at that bit of information and she knew that he took notice of it. There were still things she was trying to uncover but first, she needed to ensure that the Order could stand up on their own, that their leaders were well informed and could work efficiently on their own. They knew of the danger and knew that this was no time to slack on recruiting and training. Trying to explain to people the necessity for them was going to be difficult and if any of them began swinging around conscription papers they would cause unnecessary unrest and have many more answers to give to those ruling the lands. 

Answers she didn't have at the moment.  

“As I had said, you had other matters to attend to and that holds now.” She walked around the table she and Sebastian had been mulling over earlier and uncovered the map. “We need to sit down and discuss what you are going to do with the Wardens in your reach. I intend on keeping some posted in Vigils and Warden’s Keep and there is nothing you can do to have me change my mind." There was an audible sigh from the King but he made his way over to the table, "There are Deep Roads that we can excavate and Orzammar has already given me the go-ahead to work with them. I am also an advisor to the Prince and must ask that you sit down and hear him out as well.”

“Because I have been in a similar position.”

“Precisely. He is not incompetent and he has done well enough on his own, but unlike yourself, he doesn’t have an Anora. Or rather, he has prospects and I have no intention of placing him in a situation to be taken advantage of. I would rather not have to murder any more nobles if I can so help it… but I have and I will. When he is willing to settle down I am sure he will find someone that both he and Starkhaven will grow to love, trust and rely on.” After a moment of silence, she stood up and eyed the King.

“But until then you intend on filling that role.” 

“I am still no fan of politics, but I do understand how my reputation can sway the masses and detour idiots... now. I have guided him up until this point when he has asked for it and am rather fond of the city itself. It is a role I know well. And a role I take seriously.”

“And if matters with the Wardens were to come up.” She knew he had no idea just how deep that question cut, absolutely nobody knew that in there were mass graves recently dug at Weishaupt. Had no idea that things were changing right under their noses, hopefully for the better to be equipped for the enemy that the King just caught a glimpse of. 

“They have, but I have companions such as Warden Howe, Oghren, Sigrun and the other Warden-Commanders that I can rely on to either attend to those matters or aide Sebastian.” 

“Oghren aiding a prince?” She joined him in laughter, a decade may have passed but Oghren was still very much himself. Only now there was a ten-year-old girl of his running around too. How that dal'en was not dead was beyond the Hero, babysitting the fucker proved to neigh impossible.

“Not his specialty, that’s more Nathaniel’s area of expertise, what with him being Howe’s son and all.” She couldn’t help the smirk that crossed her features when his hand came up to his forehead and he sighed. “He has proven his loyalty and after learning plenty of things about the Wardens and his father’s decisions during the Blight, I assure you that he has nothing but my and the Orders wellbeing in mind.” She knew that Alistair had worked with Howe or a representative of his. The man could keep still for just about as long as she could and while he was a rogue he was not one to sit back and watch others do everything for him.

“And the Prince’s?” 

“Well, Sebastian did agree to house us, what a couple of years ago? That was not to say that he was happy to find out who I was after having known him for a good amount of time, but he is a reasonable man. I had been forthright with him about the purpose of having Wardens there, they were not only to defend Starkhaven in the event of an attack and train any prospective recruits... but they were to be the first sent to Ferelden if she were without any wardens, needed reinforcements or third party delegates. ” 

“You owe Ferelden nothing.” 

“No, it is Ferelden who owes me everything. I am well aware this that your majesty.” She bowed slightly.

“Is that really necessary.”

“Yes, yes it is.” She sighed, “I am not saying that we cannot be friends.”

“It’s been ten years.” 

“Correct.” She replied curtly.

“Were you always this difficult?”

“Yes, you were just oblivious to it.” She stated firmly with a smirk. “But back to the topic at hand, we may find ourselves on two different sides of the same coin. We may have had all this time spent between us, but we are still friends Alistair. And between us, I will refrain from titles, but with company, I make no promises. I take care of my friends, even if they don't necessarily know that I am.” 

“So it was you who sent me up to Rivain.” 

“Yes.” 

“Why?”

“Ferelden needs stability, it didn't help that both you and Anora cannot have children. At least not together. I was unaware as to how your ‘dragon blood’” She air quoted, “affect you having children, but I had the first-hand ongoing experience of just what kind of threat Corypheus was long before anybody else. The moment I realized that I was already under his control…”

“What?!”

“Yes, Corypheus had a more direct link to my mind and taint. Probably due to several decisions that I had made prior to that point. I don’t know if what I was hearing was a Calling. Many of the Wardens, especially the elder ones who had survived, explained it as something similar. I had no reason to believe it wasn't for the longest time. Though it was nothing like what we heard during the Blight. The only thing I did know once I was given enough information was that Wardens in Ferelden… or rather around Haven and Skyhold were being drawn somewhere. Then I found out it was a Magistrate... and sorry not sorry the last thing I wanted was for all of my hard work to be undone by some arsehole magistrate…” 

“Has anyone ever told you that your self-sacrificing ways are hypocritical and stupid?” He had stepped around the table to place his arms on her shoulders and she rolled her eyes whilst she answered.

“There is a good handful of them actually, more than I can count on my two hands.” She waved him away. "I had a couple of favors to pull, not that I needed you because whether or not they will ever admit it I know they missed you and you them. So the way I looked at it, everyone just got a free vacation to hang out with old friends and clear out some Thaigs.” 

“They were the only reason I continued to believe that you had managed to saunter your way off that battlefield somehow.” He admitted, “Oghren liked to talk and while he has gotten better since our time during the Blight, he let it slip that he was just following orders ‘from a silver-haired elf’. From that point on it was just a matter of talking him around what he didn't want to tell me..." The King paused, "Speaking of, I suppose that’s the taint taking hold?” She looked down at the silver locks that he took hold of wondering if he had always been this touchy-feely as well.

“I have no idea. Again, there have been plenty of decisions that I have made in the past that could have led to my hair losing its color.”

“Are you aware of what is going on at Weishaupt?” She had heard of his reputation as being a kind devout king, but willing to put on the pressure when necessary. Nala had never thought that she would be on the receiving end of it though and unfortunately for Alistair, she had no quarrels with half-truths or omissions. 

“No. I'll be heading up that way after regaining some more of my strength, Sebastian was not lying when he said I happened to be in town when he was setting off for your banquette.” Another half-lie, but it wasn't as if she could tell him that his invitation to the First Warden had gone to her... now could she. 

“Lingering effects of Corypheus?”

“I sure hope not, but it also wasn’t Avernus or the Architect.” The Commander quipped without much thought, then cursed herself at his drawn brows. 

“The Architect?” She held her tongue for a couple of minutes, "There is a lot we have to catch up on... but you just put this guy down on par with a Magistrate and a senile Warden Mage from decades past." 

“I think that's the first time I heard you use a Dalish word correctly, congratulations. Another Magistrate. Possibly was in cahoots with Corypheus, but I haven’t had the pleasure of speaking with him on my terms." She could already see the concern growing at the mention of there being another one of them lurking in the background. "Oh, also. Fun fact, he is the one who started the fifth blight.”

“And you didn’t kill him?” There weren't too many times when others intimidated her, especially people she knew. That was typically because hse knew enough about them to know just how they would react given any response she could throw at them. Alistair found himself in his own little bubble, she knew him and was almost positive that he wouldn't run through her given the opportunity. But, she did know that if he got a good hit on her she would be hurting and getting out of this particular room would be difficult because it was an interior room and had no window access. She was also not armed and was under no illusion that she could take him on hand-to-hand.

“I would like to think that you are well aware of my questionable good intentions.” She breathed, “He was able to wake the darkspawn from their calling. From being mindless drones. Hell, I just about shat myself when the first one spoke to me. Now I am sure eighty percent of what he said was bullshit I had to make a decision and thinking back on it now I should have let Amaranthine Fall and murdered him instead of the Broodmother… but then again if he is anything like Corypheus, who was to say that he wouldn’t just body jump and be on his merry way. We would be none the wiser.” 

“And how exactly does he wake the darkspawn up.” She could tell that he had an inkling as to how she was going to answer this question... She could also tell that he was hoping it wasn't exactly what it was. 

“Same way we turn Warden.” 

“They drink their—” She shook her head, “Warden Blood? Really?! Nala, blood magic?!” This, this she didn't miss in the least bit. Everyone idolized Wardens and put them on this fucking pedestal making them out to be the good guys. She wanted nothing more than to tell him that the first group of Wardens, according to surviving accounts, were nothing more than savages who had the bright idea to try and drink the blood of the enemy -for one reason or another- and happened to find out all the fun perks of doing that.

“You didn’t see them, Alistair. They spoke, they planned, and they weren’t the same things we were killing during the blight. I fear that I must say that they were conscious and if they can learn how to live alongside.” 

“Unbelievable. You are a threat.” 

“Do you really want to go around throwing accusations like that? I told you, I made those decisions as I did and do with any… guided with the information I had at hand. I guarantee to you that  ** if **  I had known anything about Corypheus or the bullshit that would follow ten years after the Blight I would have put further thought into letting them live."  _ Hell, I would have slaughtered Corypheus when I ran into him shortly thereafter. _

“And Avernus.”

“Has abided by my earlier requests, which both he and I needn’t do, need I remind you? Ethics are a courtesy we give others Alistair, you best remember that. It is our sole mission to stop the Blights at any and all costs. We conscript people into our ranks without their volunteer, we use blood magic freely, an act the chantry and many are completely against, and Ser Jory? I am sure you remember him and perhaps a few in your own or between ours. He, Avernus, is safe at Soldiers Peak and if I so much as hear as he has been harmed…” She paused and narrowed her sights at her fellow Warden, “Your Highness, you don’t know what I am capable of.” 

“No. I don’t.” 

“And it is best that you remember that. You may still be living and breathing because of your blood. But I still live and breathe out of pure spite, experimentation and luck.”

“Is that supposed to be a threat?” 

“No, a warning. I am saying that I have never pursued figuring out just what it is I did by allowing both Avernus and the Architect to live… to continue with their experiments. And if I must remind you, you have been living as King behind a desk an office in a building running your Kingdom. I have never stopped surviving, even now ask Sebastian about it. My unwillingness to slow down and relax is a concern amongst many. Don't make me your enemy." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If it is not obvious this is a couple of days after Chapter 3: I'll Be Here. Originally I had it placed somewhere else, Anora was still alive there was a brilliant cat-fight between the two women who can still not stand one another. And it bled into this scene...well, I chose to keep the Commanders identity hidden from the King and Queen until Post Inquisition entirely (I think this is going to be a year or two after Trespasser... I haven't made up my mind yet on that one)


	17. A soldier on my own,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She was never good at the 'getting to know you' phase of any new budding relationship of any kind. She wasn't a sit around and beat around the bush sort of girl unless you had pissed her off and the environment was entirely different than the one she found herself in. Luckily that meant that from the get-go a lot of people knew where she stood and knew that she was a rather eccentric sort of person. She was a logical sort of person, liked to think about what she said before saying things... but only when it really mattered or if she cared enough. Lynette had no qualms about shoving her foot down her mouth with first impressions... she loved being underestimated.

"There shouldn't be a need for tents tonight." She interrupted when she saw him grabbing his gear, "Don't ask why... it's just one of those things." 

"I'm aware, though you make it sound like this is an ability that is not uncommon." 

"Oh, it is. Uncommon that is. Normally that's as far as I have to go to get people to shut up...noted, those people were clansmen." She shrugged, "So is there anything that I need to know about being a Warden—that you  **can** share." She added with emphasis. "I didn't get much out of anyone, not many in the clan know what you do only that Wardens are needed to end a Blight. I got as much information as I could out of the Keeper, her First and our Storyteller." She crossed her legs and leaned back on her arms. "I am not expecting to get much until I go through some Joining process...again, little to no information there. Then there is the whole, everything we know is told orally and it's been centuries since the last Blight so I am taking anything my Clan did know with a grain of salt."  

"What would you like to know. I will answer what I can." He had paused momentarily before speaking, she wasn't sure if he was going over his head whether or not to even entertain her questioning or if her idiom had confused him. She knew that salt was something that existed, her salted meats informed her of that much... whether or not the phrase was commonly used though, she had no idea. But she had a workaround, blame anything wonky she said as an 'elf thing.' 

"You can die from the Joining can't you?" That caught the Warden off guard, though there were no physical clues that she had reading Duncan was best compared to reading a brick wall or watching paint dry. "Call it an assumption. Not that it matters, I suppose." She sighed, rolling her shoulders. "Since I am dying anyway." 

"And you came to the conclusion how?" Intrigue, knowing she could work with intrigue she let her mind go to work and spewed the thoughts as they came forth.

"Simple. Wardens mean Blight. Blight means Darkspawn. Darkspawn means any and every Clan with the right mind will get the fuck out of dodge. Ahh—move, I mean. You were traveling looking for recruits. You stated as much. Marethari's job is to protect the Clan, if the Blight were spread further and we lost our Halla or something...then sure, let most the hunters join the Wardens. Healthy, capable members of the Clan...because we are dead anyway. But, that's the thing. Our Halla are healthy and outside of this cave incident there were no indications of a Blight...the cave was south. The forest was dead silent when I returned, those creatures were everywhere. The forest dies when the Darkspawn come. Our incident in the cave likely saved the Clan and gave the Keeper reason to leave. You showing up solidified that. Tamlen, if he were found healthy enough may have been offered as well to the cause. I am not incapable, my Clan would have told you that. I staved off death, with aide... and we have no reason to offer anyone without more than incidental proof—why piss off a clan if you can help it? Especially if you may need them again if this spreads? Therefore, the most logical answer is for her to offer me up. You claim you can possibly cure me if I become a Warden. There are broken tales of the sacrifices that must be made. Nothing coherent, but "Joining" comes up frequently." 

"You're well informed." 

"Pffft. Some people call it being nosy," She rolled her eyes, "I like to know things. I look for patterns, for connecting lines. It can keep you two or six steps ahead of your opponent and be invaluable to allies." She had let gravity drag her body down to the ground waiting for his response. After a couple of awkward moments, she had chalked up the conversation to having been killed before it got started then surprise-surprise the Warden spoke once more. 

"Yes, you may die."  _His accent would likely have me crawling up and down him at the snap of the fingers if he would say more than ten things tops to me at any one point._ The elf smirked to herself all the while trying to keep her mind off of the tragic events that had gone down in the last couple of days.

"Well...again, I am dying anyway." She shrugged knowing death came for everyone made it a little less painful and if she was trying to be obnoxiously morbidly optimistic all she had to do was remind herself that Tamlen would be waiting on the other side for her. "Never saw my life taking this kind of turn. This Ostagar place, are there many Wardens?"  

"A good handful." 

"That's not reassuring... Is there any reason for the lack of presence?" Again there was that awkward minute or two of pause, this time she interrupted before he could mull over whether or not to answer the question or how best to talk around it. "Or is it simply the time between." 

"A story for another time." Nodding as he took the out she brought her hands behind her head. 

"Fair. Any questions of me? I don't wish for you to feel as if I am interrogating you. Though I am, as I am sure you are aware. I will know next to nothing about the norms and customs amongst your kind. And I do not take lightly to being reminded of the obvious." A part of her wondered if this pausing thing was normal for him, or if perhaps her inability to remain silent was just throwing him off of his game. It was already bad enough that she was removed from her clan and given to a complete stranger for some 'supposed' noble cause... she could hardly sit in quiet on patrol for longer than two minutes and him having told her it was about a five-day trip and while she was no mathematician Lynette was pretty sure five days was longer than two minutes.

"Any noteworthy skills I should be aware of." 

"I'm a Ranger." His gaze remained on her for a moment longer than necessary causing her to look over at him from her flattened position. "I kid you not. Syriannas and I have been together as long as I know. I would use her to escape and scout the forests more times than I care to admit. I specialize or am most comfortable with a bow, daggers are my next proficient item. Though dual-wielding is still new and awkward to me – and I've never held a sword a day in my life."

"What would you say your weaknesses are." She and Duncan were going to get along, he seemed like a straight and to the point sort of guy as well, knowledgable enough in others cultures and customs and didn't seem like an overall arse. 

"My mouth, though it's also a strength. I can talk myself out of trouble as much as I can get into. Just know that I choose my battles and most of them are for pure amusement. I've already mentioned the cultural stuff and racism. I suppose the most important thing is that I am motivated by spite." 

"As in?" 

"You tell me I can't do something, I am going to do it better than you could have imagined. If things get personal I not only go after you, but I make myself into a better, stronger, version of you and what you insulted. Case and point, Tamlen was the best hunter in the Clan...until we got into a fight. 


	18. Think of me and burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She couldn't tell when she was awake or asleep anymore. Just when she thought she had figured out which one was a dream and which was reality she was turned on her head. It was getting to be too confusing for her to keep pieced together, she was mixing people up and forgetting important events. All she knew was that her life was in danger and someone was trying their damnest to run her dry, she just couldn't bring herself to believe that the life she yearned for was reality... because how could someone from a world such as that dream up this dreary, gray, unpredictable, advanced, technologic based world.

 

 “Commander?” She was shaken awake by a familiar accent, up in a heartbeat it didn’t take long for her to realize that something was horribly wrong. 

“You need to leave.” Her amber eyes were focused solely on Oghren and Sigrun, everyone else in the room was moot. She needed to get them out of here and away from the dangers they could not see. “I need you, my Wardens, to leave and get as far away from the Inquisition, from here." She could see the hesitation and confusion settling on their features, "From me as you can.” She admitted and could have sworn that the temperature in the room had dropped several degrees.

They remained eerily silent and she wasn't sure if it was because of the tone or conviction in her voice. There were not many things that would shut her best friend up, even in the most awkward of situations he would find a way to find some humor behind it. She couldn't imagine where she would be without him and it was this fear that drove her to stand her ground with this sudden decision. 

The two Wardens looked at one another and Nala found herself staring into the seemingly never-ending pool of blue she had turned to rely so heavily on over these years. “I have to leave and I fear that my best option may be the very thing that you are going to vehemently oppose.” She admitted knowing that while he abhorred not having all of the information to make a solid sound decision, he had been given enough to piece together the pieces of a puzzle she had vehemently guarded. “All of you.” 

If you had asked her where she saw herself ten years ago she would have answered solemnly 'dead in ditch knowing my luck.' It would have never crossed her mind that she would continue to accomplish great things... hell up until she had been given a hail mary from the last place she would have ever suspected, she was under no illusion that her battle with the dreaded archdemon was going to end up with her dead and she could only hope she would take the demon down with her. 

Yet here she was a decade later and she couldn't be prouder of what she had accomplished, what they had accomplished. She had helped a Prince retake his lands, saved someone she loved from the very guild that brought them together -and then placed him as its new leader-, she planted a seed of doubt in the minds of her fellow Warden Commanders about their blind loyalties, set up a new post for her own personal sect of Wardens, found someone worthy of her unyielding admiration and respect who she wanted to grow alongside with. 

She would sooner die than watch this crumble under her, by her very hand at that. 

The Hero Warden-Commander of Fereldon curled in on herself, her vision whitening as the world begun to spin. “You need to calm down Commander, you’re extremely ill and we don’t know what grasps you.” She was grasping an arm and looking back into those pools of blue, not wanting to share what she knew she must if she wanted any of her requests to be followed. 

“The taint.” The room was too hot, everything too hot. Just him being this close was making her vision blur. “Since I left Amaranthine, since the Architect." Regrets, she had enough to count on two hands they weren't many compared to others in her line of work. But they were grave and likely would bring dire consequences in their wake. "I fear I may have allowed for a great danger to grow. I may have walked straight into a trap and put all of Ferelden, Starkhaven and possibly Thedas at risk.” She could see confusion in his eyes, concern on his lips. 

“What do you mean Commander," Her eyes flipped over to the woman she had taken under her wing. The woman who was ready to throw her life away and believed she was beyond saving. "What does that blighted mad man have to do with any of this?” Sigrun asked, Sebastian made to step away but her whitened grip remained on his forearm and he chose instead to sit in the chair next to her bed. “Additionally, I want it to be known that I had opposed working with the corruption.” The way the former Legionnaire had crossed her arms and scowled had the Commander chuckling in amusement. 

“Exactly, I can’t say that I understand what’s happening to me. I don’t. Not even in the slightest and the Wardens up north were all but helpful." She admitted to her loyal circle, "All I do know is that this singing  **is** growing louder-,” 

“You’re hearing the calling?” This time it was the Prince who interrupted, “You informed me that wouldn’t be a problem for thirty or so years.” Half-truths always had a bad habit of coming back to bite you in the ass later, she knew it and it was for this reason why she preferred omission. You never know who would remember what or what piece of information was important enough to note for others.

“Yeah," She let her grasp go now entirely exhausted. "Well, you should know by now that I don’t like to play by normal rules, Sebastian.” She winked with a chuckle as she leaned her head back against the bed frame. “Also, it would make sense. Thirty years is just what we are told now, who is to say that those who lived through a Blight itself didn’t fall sooner?” Another partial omission, there was nothing solid that she or Avernus could find outside of a few personal journals up in the Anderfels and a couple of old scriptures in Soldier's Peak about that particular topic. “That’s my kind of luck. But not the point. I know that this is not the Calling, not  **_my_ Calling **.” Images of a creature extremely similar to the Architect were seared into her mind, ghosts of a lifetime ago seemingly back to taunt her. “Have we received word back from the King of Ferelden?” 

“Zevran wrote about how he was keeping him busy in Antiva on Royal business or something. Apparently, he and the Queen had already gone to visit the Inquisitor before he had whisked him away." Oghren chuckled at Sebastian's response, the Prince then paused for a moment and knit his brows before continuing. “He also mentioned that the King’s love for cheese hasn’t waned since the Blight?” The laughter that escaped her lips was cathartic and she felt almost as if she wasn't knocking on death's door.

“Good.” Nala managed out before turning to Oghren. “I need you to gather all our recruits and get them up to Antiva or Rivain. The further the better." 

“What?!” There weren't many times when Sigrun lost her composure, but when they were they were hilarious for the Commander. 

“Commander?” Oghren on the other hand only now seemed to comprehend the direness of the situation with this order.

“I’d like to be made aware as to why some of our best fighters are being sent away,” Sebastian remarked crossing his arms and hardening his voice. It was one bomb after the other that she found herself having to drop, such was the game when you played in the shadows. “You’ve done nothing but avoid answering our questions. You look horrible and you haven’t been out of your room for more than a couple of hours since returning from Haven.” She had seen him mad, furious, upset and betrayed. She had even seen him concerned, but this was different and she didn't want to wonder why. 

She couldn't afford to.

“I must reiterate. I don’t know what is wrong. All I know is that the last time I felt like this was when I was on Warden Business in the Vimmark Mountains.” That seemed to catch the Prince’s attention, his micro-expressions would forever be the death of him. “You’ve heard?”

“Hawke mentioned it in passing a couple of times. Carver explained it a bit, but there was never any details given while I was around.” He admitted, “Said it was family business.” 

“Oh? Now I'm curious. I will have to write to Hawke about it or something. Eventually, I will meet this elusive man,” She muttered to herself. “Anyway, yes. This does not leave this room.” She growled receiving nods or some form of acknowledgment from the three. “I received word from Weisshaupt, the only word from there need I add, during my time resolving the issues in Amaranthine.”

“The Darkspawn Civil War.” She winced at the look that the Prince gave her in response to Sigrun’s statement. Omissions weren't as bad as half-truths and saying you could keep the people who knew little pieces of the entire story apart, it worked marvelously. When they were together and you began to unwind your tales, feelings were bound to get hurt.

“Yes. It was the reason why I left immediately, well…” She paused, Oghren snorted. “Part of the reason. Anyway, I was ordered to go to one of the our…bases in the Vimmark Mountains to oversee and report on the Wardens work being done there.” As she spoke and memories of her time at the prison came back to her the Warden Commanders skin prickled. “I cannot get into detail about the goings-on of the base, especially if Hawke would prefer the aftermaths of it to remain secret. Anyway, as I approached the base I felt sick. Drained. I don’t know how to describe it other than it felt very much like how I felt during my travel to, at and away from Haven. I interrogated a prisoner, interested in pursuing any further leads on the information I had learned during my time in Amaranthine and Vigils Keep. That… thing I interrogated, it knew things it shouldn’t have. Details about my life, about my time during the Blight." Her eyes shifted down to the blanket that lay on her lap, "It was only after this rather intrusive dialogue that I realized that the base was not nearly secured or populated as a prisoner of that magnitude would warrant. So I started to ask questions.” She shook her head, “I may have been a new Warden, a year old with no knowledge on how things were done properly, but even I could tell you that the answered they offered were roundabout, never to the point and fluffy. In addition to this, they were preparing a party who were coming up to enter the Deep Roads and heed their call. There was something wrong, something dark and something extremely sinister going on in those mountains... to this day I had  **never** felt that way and I have been through many Deep Roads." With a sigh, she deflated further against the headboard, " I do not know what is going on, but I have that feeling again. It wrapped around me like a constricting blanket  **during** my time in Haven and it  **hasn't** left me since. Sebastian…Oghren. You need to get everyone out of here if my fear is even the least bit true…” 

“I’ll have them out of here in two days Commander, but what am I to tell them?” A smile swept across her features and she snatched the paperwork and maps she had on the bed stand to her left, promptly ignoring the haze and dizziness that the sudden motion caused. 

“I am sure that King Theirin is out of practice and could stretch his muscles with a simple Thaig clearing.” She handed the maps over to the dwarf, “I have already spoken with the bureaucracy up there, the Thaigs were accidentally found a year or so ago and I have been promising to come up there and clear them out so that they can send an expedition down there and retrieve anything of any historical or monetary importance.” It was a blatant lie, but she didn't find a need to use them frequently. It also helped that absolutely nobody in that room had any idea as to how the Wardens were set up around Thedas and even if they had questioned her she would have stated that everyone wanted to meet the Warden who survived slaying an Archdemon.

“Oh Commander, you spoil us.” She knew that Sigrun would appreciate another trip downstairs just as much as Oghren would. 

“Anyway, I can.” She winked as she handed the Starkhaven Warden-Commander copies of what information she had on the roads. “I don’t know how dangerous it will be, but I know how well you and the King work together and how well you and our men work here." 

"Aww, you flatter me, Commander." The elf rolled her eyes but continued.

"This is a good chance to show some of the new kids this boogeyman we are sworn to eradicate… since I cleaned up that Blight before anyone else could even think about sending help. Now. I need you to keep the King alive. Creators forbid having Anora exiling us from Ferelden after we just have been invited back.” 

“What about casualties on our end” Sigrun frowned crossing her arms. 

“The. King. Stays. Alive. Or Ferelden is going to find themselves with an assassinated Queen." She growled, "I have the utmost faith in our men's skill.” Another boisterous laugh erupted from her long-time drinking buddy. 

“You're thinking that his time on that throne has fattened him up like the spoiled nug that he is.” 

“Something like that." She admitted running a hand through her hair. "If he begins to ask too many questions go to Anora, she's agreed to the entire outing. Not that she knew she was speaking with me, but believes it could improve relations with Ferelden and the hosting parties Monarch.” Both her dwarven Officers looked over the documents before nodding and excusing themselves. "Go on, what are you burning to ask me?"

“Where is it you are intending to go?” She had been hoping that he would ask something she could dance around, or didn't have a complete answer to. Of course, he would happen to ask the only thing she had surety of and would surely cause an argument. 

“Kirkwall.”

“What?” He had raised his voice, though she was positive it was out of surprise than anything else. 

“Calm down. One I am no damsel in distress… additionally, I have received word that the Arishok there is my Sten.” The smile that spread across her features was genuine as was the warmth that came to her at the thought of meeting up with her old Companion. 

“The one you traveled with during the Blight?” 

“The very one. Sten was just his title then, it means Infantry Commander. Now he is the new Arishok in Kirkwall and I am willing to vouch for his presence there if that has been causing you or your allies any concern." He shook his head, "I haven’t seen him in person in a couple of years, but Sten—I mean the Arishok is a good man. Probably one of the few Qunari that I have met who are don’t impose their beliefs on you, but merely offer guidance and allow you to live your life and make mistakes.” 

“You traveled to Par Vollen if I remember correctly.” 

“Ah! Yes with Zevran.” She laughed, happy warm memories flickered in her mind. “And let me tell you. That was not my best decision. Not me traveling up there, but the company I brought. I was convinced that we were going to be murdered for some of the shit we said while traveling. Luckily my title as Ashkaari seemed to come in handy more times than I would like to admit.” 

“Ashkaari." She cocked her head to the side as he seemed to mull something over, "So they were talking about you?” 

“Depends, who was it?”

“A Qunari vessel, likely the one your Sten was located on a couple of months back.” She had remembered this particular grievance, having not been in the city when it happened all she got from Sebastian was a 'don't worry about it, it was just a minor miscommunication.' She had attempted a couple of times to ask where exactly the error had come from, but when he refused to elaborate she just chose to have basic Qunlat taught to the Wardens in town. That, of course, meant trying to teach Oghren and Sigrun what she had learned, one was more receiving the other better at retaining. 

An entirely annoying necessary experience nevertheless.

“Don’t worry about it. Given your background with the Qunari… hell the Free Marches recent history with them I am not surprised that the reception was far from welcoming at port." She placed a hand on his shoulder, "I am just surprised that Kirkwall is still willing. Again, Sten-The current Arishok is a good man and I do believe that both sides can learn quite a bit about one another. Also, if he fucks up I will just have to go over there and kill him myself." She brought her hand back and shrugged, " It's terms we have already set and agreed to"

“What?” 

“Yeah. It’s why I am going to go there. The Arishok and I agreed to die by the other's hand if things were to go bad or we found one another on the opposite sides of the battlefield instead of back-to-back. If I am as sick as I feel I am, then he is the only one I can go to who will follow through with my wishes without a second thought. Zevran claims that he would, but I know that man… and the last thing I want to do is have my blood on his hands as well. Alistair is completely out of the question, if he is near then chances are that he could be infected as well. Leliana is in the one place that I cannot go at the moment. Wynne has passed away and even if I could I would not ask that of her. I have no idea what adventures Shale has followed nor where she is located. Patton’s pack wouldn’t dare and Morrigan is also out of reach…my Wardens. No, I will go to the Arishok. It is my wish.” 

“You don’t believe I would follow through with your wishes?”

“We may not have known each other that long, but I have a strong suspicion you would likely hold on for as long as you could." His knowing smirk told her she hit that on the nail, "I am a danger Sebastian and having played the prominent role I had in helping you build up Starkhaven to where she stands currently… I have no intention of taking part in destroying her.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you notice any errors, please feel free to let me know in a message. I eventually go over my work enough to catch them all, but that does not mean that I don't take months-long hiatus'. 


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still, a bit put off by this 'Joining' that everyone was all hush-hush about Nala finds herself walking through unknown forests in search of both treaties of old and the blood of their enemy. Not even five paces into the forests and she knows that something is wrong, the hairs on the back of her neck and arms stand at end, the air is unusually thick. The wolves they had run into were as crazed, if not more so than the ones she had run into with Tamlen. There was no negotiating with them, the only thing they wanted to do was rip them to shreds and she couldn't help but feel as if they were focusing their attention on Alistair... the Warden of the group and their guide.

“Nice to know that everyone who has had their ass handed to them looks the same dying, no matter the era or race.” Nala found herself joking aloud as they walked up to the crawling man. “Though, he’s got quite a bit of blood on him. Must have been one hell of a battle. I’d hate to see the other guy.” They hadn't been out for long and while a part of her was happy that this was proving to be a bit more eventful than she had anticipated. She didn't like not being familiar with the lands or knowing how far, even approximately, they were going for these treaties. Another, louder bit, part of her mind was wondering why these treaties were not better-kept track of. Duncan had all but blatantly stated that this was a Blight and he had been traveling for recruits for at least the last half-year or so...saying he started back when he picked up Alistair.

“Who is that?” If the amount of blood on him was any indication of just how screwed this man was, then the Dale would have been surprised that he was still breathing. She had seen her fair share of injuries both here and there, unfortunately, this kind of splatter didn't look familiar to anything she had witnessed. “Grey Wardens?” She crouched down to get a better look and see if she could find a source of bleeding. Having the ability to talk, clearly at that, meant that his airway was of no immediate concern. It took him a moment, but he inevitably lifted his head and met her gaze.

“Well… he’s not half as dead as he looks, is he?”  

“Oh ho ho. I knew we were going to get along.” Unable to refrain from chuckling the dale looked back over at the blond and winked as she spoke. Not being allowed into where the Warden's were camped out until they completed their Joining she was under the impression that Duncan's personality was more of the norm. That was not to say that she didn't enjoy his company, she rather enjoyed the teasing the two shared during their travels from her Clan and she understood the personality flip when they had arrived to Ostigar. Alistair had thrown a wrench into her initial presumption the moment she had found him. He was younger than she had thought he would have been and clearly far more emotional than Duncan had ever been forthright. So long as the others within their ranks were a mixture of the two and shared the same kind of dark humor, there wasn't a doubt in her mind that she would fit right in. 

“My scouting band was attacked by darkspawn. They came out of the ground. Please help me. I’ve… I’ve got to return to camp.” She had turned her attention over toward their guide only to find him seemingly waiting for her to make a decision. Knitting her brows in slight confusion she fell back into a role she was more than comfortable with. Having no idea just how far out they had to go, how many supplies everyone had on hand or how severe his injury... things were not looking good. She didn't have any poultices to offer even if she wanted to. 

“We don’t have time for this… let’s go.” Letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding in the Sergeant lifted herself back up, leaving someone was not something that came easily to anyone no matter the amount of time they had served. It was not something she would do under normal circumstances, but these 'darkspawn' had run through an entire scouting party and based on the lack of monstrous bodies littering the ground around him.

“We don’t have time?”  _ What in the fuck.  _ “What? You have an urgent meeting somewhere?” She didn't have many peeves, but this was definitely one of them. 

“Would you rather we take him all the way back to camp and lose daylight?” Her arms crossed reflexively as she glared further, “I was under the impression we were to return as quickly as possible before the end of the day.” Nala gave the Warden credit for not immediately recoiling back at her stern voice and coiled body language. Instead, the two of them stood their ground. In her eyes, he was the leader of the group by experience, a couple of months or not. She had initially turned to him for guidance and only found him seeking that of her. If he had such strong grounds or reasons to act upon why hadn’t he? This entire situation could have been avoided and was proving to be a waste of precious time.

And she loathed wasting such a finite resource. 

“If you’d just bandage me up, I can make it back to camp.” Luckily for everyone involved actively or passively, it would be their injured friend who spoke up, both Jory and Daveth seemed to have lost their ability to speak. 

“I have bandages in my pack.” He walked past her and knelt down to tend to the wounded warrior. She kept herself angled to where she could watch the two of them from the corner of her eye and pointed out where she wanted Jory and Daveth to keep guard. The last thing anyone needed was for them to be ambushed once more, albeit she would have hoped they would have done so by now, and cause any further delays in their mission. She had more to lose if they failed to gather what it is they needed for the Joining, both Daveth and Jory could walk away none the wiser or even wait another week, month or year to retake the Joining. She was living on borrowed time and the fever she had been cursed with since waking up had been a constant reminder of this. The burning bite from the enraged wolf from earlier had been a quick wake up call to the dangers of this...whatever this was.

Dream induced or not. 

“Thank you!” Continuing to watch from her peripherals as Alistair helped the soldier to his feet as a wave of guilt rushed over the elf. The only thing the Warden had done was throw a splint on his left leg. All the man was asking for was simple first aide and that was something she was more than capable of offering. “I… I’ve got to get out of here!” He gave her a cautionary glance before limping his way back down the path they have come from.  

“Did you hear?” She turned her attention to Jory wondering if perhaps he had picked up something of a threat. “An entire patrol of seasoned men killed by darkspawn!”  _ We were all quite literally standing here.  _

“Calm down Ser Jory. We’ll be fine if we’re careful.” Alistair’s placating words were shallow at best and a quick glance at Daveth told her that he thought so as well. The rogue could only offer a quick smirk before rolling his eyes and tossing on of his daggers into the air, giving Nala the distinct impression that this wasn't completely out of character for the red-headed recruit. 

“Those soldiers were careful and they were still overwhelmed. How many darkspawn can the four of us slay? A dozen? A hundred? There’s an entire army in these forests.” Looking back up until the sky Nala found herself stepping forward and away from the moot conversation toward their main objective. Unfortunately for her, they continued behind her without pause. 

“There are darkspawn about, but we’re in no danger of walking into the bulk of the horde,”

“How do you know? I’m not a coward, but this is foolish and reckless. We should go back.”

“We’re fair from helpless here. We’ll be fine.”

“I still do not relish the thought of encountering an army.” Was the redhead’s immediate spat, had this not been the final straw for the Warden it would have been for her. Listening to an adult bitch, complain and whine had never been something she was good at. Especially when it was about things that pertain to the job you had volunteered for, yes you could get shot... and yes it would hurt. But it wasn't as if you didn't know this long before raising your hand and taking Oath. If this was how all the Knights in the king's army were the sergeant couldn't help but wonder if perhaps the Wardens were screwed from the get-go. She couldn't help but wonder if the kind of conviction she saw in Duncan, and a small bit in Alistair, was not a thing shared among everyone who picked these kinds of careers. 

“Know this. All Grey Wardens can sense darkspawn. Whatever their cunning. I guarantee they won’t take us by surprise. That’s why I’m here.”

“You see Ser Knight, we might die. But we’ll be warned about it first.”

“Ha! I take it back, Daveth is going to be my favorite.” This earned earnest laughter from the blonde as she swung an arm around the rogue as they neared a bridge. 


End file.
